Women Share The Major Red Flags They Saw While On A First Date

Whether they won't stop talking about their "crazy ex" or if they assume one date means marriage, these men were every woman's nightmare date. And now the women are telling all.

“Um, Excuse Me?”

1) “He went on and on about how awful his sister was. Then he told me they live together and asked if I wanted to go meet her.”–

2) “He told me that women are the root of all wars in the world, and when men find a way to reproduce without needing women there would be a genocide, except for the more attractive ones who would be used for fooling around with. Apparently, I’d be saved, which was nice.”–

3) “He said, ‘My ex-girlfriend’s parents thought I was abusive.'”–

4) “He said, ‘Is it weird I want to get you pregnant?’ Bye.”–

5) “He said he loved me.”–

6) “He told me on the first date that he’d just been released from an involuntary psych hold that his parents had put him under because he’d tried to kill his (pregnant) ex-girlfriend.”

The Night Began With Dinner And Ended In A Chase

7) “I was on a date with this guy. I knew he was not someone my mother would approve of, but I was going through a belated teenage rebellion. Anyway, he told me he is going to take me out on a date, told me what to wear, which stupidly, I readily agreed to. We get to this very average looking restaurant, have a very average meal, we come to pay (backstory – on dates I never let my date pay for me), and I get my purse out to pay my half. He makes no move to get any money out, so after an awkward couple of minutes, I eventually ask what’s up. He says, ‘Well, as I drove us here, you can pay for the food.’ Already I know this guy is not getting a second date, but I’ve spent all my cash on dinner so I need him to drive me home.

I got back in the car with him and we were about 7 miles from my house when the police come up behind us and start flashing us to pull over. He started to try and pull away and go on a chase, which was incredibly short-lived, all the while I am screaming for him to stop and praying to every God there is. Turns out he was arrested that night for taking advantage of a girl under the age of 14, robbery, and ABH (assault causing actual bodily harm). He contacted me about 8 months after, I presume he had been released from prison, asking me for another date…”

Definite Creep Factor

8) “He wore a trenchcoat to a Starbucks date.”–

9) “When I got to the restaurant he was watching an adult film on his mobile phone.”–

10) “He put on a red clown nose and started jazz scatting instead of talking. I will never know why.”–

11) “He brought his grandma on the date with us. Yes, he knew it was a date. No, this wasn’t in middle school or before either of us had a license. He literally just invited his grandma along.”–

12) “He told me I was allowed two sheets of toilet paper before letting me use his bathroom and tried to watch me to make sure I didn’t use more.”–

13) “He told me he had bought surveillance equipment to keep track of his last girlfriend. Yeah — first and only date.”

He Freaked When He Couldn’t Get His Way

14) “He realized I wasn’t going to sleep with him after dinner when I turned down his offer to go back to his place. He went to the bathroom and when he came back his phone rang. He then took the call and proceeded to have the most staged conversation with his roommate ever and had to leave very suddenly, so suddenly he couldn’t pay for his part of our meal or the 3 pints he drank. He messaged me the next day to apologize and tried to get me to go to his place to just watch movies. When I turned him down he called me ugly.”

“Do You Want To Come Meet My Cats?”

15) “He not only talked about his ex, but broke down crying about her, saying she was the one. He then went into the bathroom and stole a sign off the restaurant wall and we had to make a quick exit as they threatened to call the cops. It was probably the size of a piece of paper but made of metal. He told me in the car that he is a kleptomaniac and couldn’t help it. He then offered to take me back to his place to see his collection and meet his cats. I declined.”

These Women Couldn’t Believe What They Had Gotten Themselves Into

16) “He went to the bathroom and sent me a text asking if he could kiss me.”–

17) “He sat down at the table and very deliberately placed is wallet overflowing with cash and his Rolex next his plate and told me he’d take me shopping, so I’d ‘start dressing like a woman.’ We were 18.”–

18) “He waited until we were on our first date to tell me he was polyamorous. His wife (who told me, ‘my friend thinks you’re cute’) was the one who set us up.”–

19) “I was not the only girl who he invited to the party as his date.”

“He Ruined Any Chance He Ever Had With Any Of Us”

20) “My sister and I met him at a picnic for my dad’s work and we both chatted with him and honestly neither of us were particularly interested in him. We had some mutual friends but lived in different towns — he was in his first year of college, I was a senior in high school, my sister was a junior. He got our home phone number (the good ol’ days before everyone had cell phones) and called me to ask if I’d want to have dinner with him at a pizza place nearby. I was young, just kind of figured why not?

Met him there, did have a nice time talking and I do remember that he was funny and made me laugh. Then he kind of leaned back and said something to the effect of, ‘Man, I’m really having a good time, but, I wish you had your sister’s looks, or that she had your personality.’ When he said it, I literally didn’t know what to do or say, because while I’m not stunningly gorgeous by any means, I had never had anyone tell me he wished I looked like someone else. Like I said, I was 17 and really just going out with him because he’d asked, but to tell me he wished I looked like my sister — an insult to me — and that he wished she had my personality — an insult to her — he ruined any chance he ever had with either one of us.”–

The Date Couldn’t Be Over Fast Enough

21) “He kept talking about how he gets headaches so often because his brain is larger than most and the calcium builds up. To this day I have no idea if that’s a legitimate thing, but why would you brag about the size of your brain on a first date?”–

22) “Once I went out with a guy and he ordered his food AND started eating it before I got there, and told me that he asked my ex-boyfriend for permission to ask me out.”–

23) “He said he wanted to take me somewhere nice, so I dressed up. He took me to the drive-thru at Taco Bell. There was no second date.”–

24) “‘Oh yeah, I had an assault charge a few years back, but it got dropped…’ WHO SAYS THAT ON THE FIRST DATE!!!”–

25) “He assumed he was spending the night at my place and mentioned this pretty matter-of-factly about 30 minutes into dinner. Nope. Answered the trusty first date ’emergency’ call from the BFF and got the heck out of there.”–

26) “He constantly compared me to his sister. All. Night. Long.”

A Cringeworthy Coffee Date

27) “I had just broken up with an ex when one of the guys I worked with decided to hook me up with his brother. He proceeded to do two things that made it obvious that he was a terrible person.

We went on a coffee date and first he got upset with me that I wouldn’t pay for him. I firmly believe that you should go dutch most dates, but especially on the first one. I don’t drink coffee, so I ordered tea and paid in cash since it was like $2. He ordered some weirdly complicated Starbucks-esque latte and then stared at me when the barista said it was almost $10 until he realized it wasn’t happening, sighed loudly, and threw (not handed) a $50 at the guy. Then, he got jealous of a baby. There was a young couple with there probably 8 or 9-month-old in a booster seat sitting at a table across from us. During a lull in conversation, the kid caught my eye and beamed at me, and then said ‘HI!’ really loudly. I said ‘hi’ back, and she smiled even wider. He let out this annoyed noise and said something like, ‘Hello? You’re on a date with me, not with the brat.’ Yikes.”

“He Called My Cat Ugly”

28) “He made a big deal about his illegal side job. I finally asked what he did and he told me he was a small arms dealer. I wasn’t sure what that meant so I asked. Turns out he sells brass knuckles to his friends.”–

29) “Me: ‘I’m lactose intolerant.’

Him: ‘Let’s go to Baskin Robbins.’

All I could have there was lemon-lime sorbet.”–

30) “He asked me if I was bi because I mentioned that I liked Orange is the New Black. First, that’s not any of your business, and second, how the heck does me liking a popular show in any way indicate my preferences?”–

31) “We never even made it there. The night before our first date, my sister went into labor. I said I’d need to postpone our plans so I could go be with my sister and the baby, and he got angry and ‘punished’ me by giving me rude one-word answers to all my texts for the next day. By the time he’d decided I was forgiven and started responding to me again, I’d already realized I’d dodged a bullet.”–

32) “He had a shrine to Natalie Portman, including weird candid paparazzi shots.”–

33) “He called my cat ugly when picking me up from my house. I kicked him out and threw his flowers at him.”

“I Never Thought I’d See Anything Like That In Real Life”

34) “Went back to his place to chill out and stuff (we had worked together for a while so I knew him quite well), thought it’d be pretty cool to just hang out and play some games. We drive to his house, it’s a nice area, pull up outside and get out the car. Everything’s cool at this point, things look pretty normal; kids playing out in the street, a guy mowing his lawn – all normal.

We go up to the front door, he opens it and we step into the house. Oh. My. God. I have never in all my life seen anything like this, before or since. He was a massive hoarder. Not even like just a bit of stuff lying around, this guy had paths carved through his mountains of junk. Did he act embarrassed by this? Lol nope, he acted as though this was normal. He was 23, he knew this was not normal, he had been to other people’s houses, he knew this was well outside the realm of normal. Out of pure pity, I hung out and acted pretty normal, didn’t say anything.

I stayed for a couple of hours, trying not to touch anything because: a) it was filthy and b) I didn’t want a mountain of crap falling on top of me and killing me. After I left, I immediately had a shower. Holy crap, it was like the houses you see on TV programs about hoarders; I never thought I’d see something like that in real life. And no, I didn’t go on another date with him. I let him down gently.”

She Was, Unknowingly, The Other Woman

35) “A friend went on a first date recently with a guy that she met at a speed dating event. It was going okay, apparently he was very charming. During dinner his phone rang, so he answered it with no attempt to apologize before answering. She thought that was rude, but tried not to listen in to whomever he was being quite sweet to, albeit talking about food shopping. After the call he mentioned in passing that his 3-month-old son was continually crying and wouldn’t nap properly, and that was the mother asking for him to gather certain supplies. So my friend asked if he was divorced or not in a relationship with the mother, to which he replied that no, he was married, but that his wife wasn’t interested in sex after giving birth, and besides she thought he was in a business meeting so what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. My friend stood up and shouted something like, ‘You cheater, you’re married!’ so all around could hear, threw her drink all over him, and stormed off swearing like a sailor, telling any woman who would listen how much of a jerk the guy was. So yeah, discussing his wife and kid was a huge red flag.”

Run, Girl, Run

36) “Anybody who brings up the ‘crazy ex’ or the ‘you’re not like other girls’ nonsense.”–

37) “Told me no one ever fancied him, that he was horrible, that he couldn’t get the hang of love, that his exes were all horrible people, and that he just wasn’t suited to relationships.”–

38) “He started trying to get me to plan the next date with him. That would be fine, had it been going well and he said something akin to, ‘So are you free again next week?’ Instead, he showed no interest in actually getting to know me, asked no questions, and then said, ‘Hey, let’s go down a canyon on a night hike tomorrow night.’ I asked if he was going with a group. He told me no, he was hoping it could just be the two of us.”–

39) “He told me a story about how he stole a car and weapon from the army and deserted in order to track down his cheating girlfriend and kill the guy who she left him for. He went to prison and was discharged. He SAYS he didn’t go through with his plan…”–

40) “A guy asked me to coffee once and when I agreed he changed the location to a bar right down the street from his house. I was underage, so I got to sit and watch him drink. He also talked about how all his friends hated his female best friend. He talked about her a little too affectionately anyway, I thought he was kind of in love with her. At the end of the terrible date, he told me my butt looked good in my shorts. I never saw him again.”

Maybe He Was Overly Excited, But He Was Probably Just Creepy

41) “I met a guy online & agreed to meet him at a restaurant. He was waiting for me in the parking lot. I barely had time to get out of my car before he was shoving his tongue down my throat. I went ahead with the date chalking it up to exuberance. Afterward, he sent me a long email about how excited his whole family was for us and he couldn’t wait to get married. I let him know real quick that wasn’t happening. Then, his twin sister calls me begging to give him another chance.”

He Didn’t Leave A Tip For The Worst Reason

42) We went to a bar in New York City for dinner and drinks. There were a lot of waiters who were gay or trans (let me add they were all so sweet, so attentive and great at their job).

At first, I thought I was imagining my date roll his eyes every time our waiter spoke or came to close to him. I mean, it’s 2017, do people really discriminate like that still? Yup. Anyway, we both found common ground that we went to Catholic school. Well, that just made me realize I wasn’t crazy that he was rolling his eyes at our gay waiter and proceeded to go on a rant about how ‘it disgusted him and it wasn’t God’s plan.’ I sat there being sarcastic after that, then proceeded to watch him give our waiter a $0 tip. I got up immediately, handed our waiter a $50 tip and said, ‘Thank you so much for your wonderful service, I do apologize for my rude date, he is indeed a pompous, inconsiderate jerk. But don’t worry, there won’t be a second date.'”

“The Whole Date Was One Red Flag After Another”

43) “He stared at me while I ate, not saying a word, just staring intensely. Then he wanted us to go back to his place because he had no money, and I wasn’t going to pay for more than his meal when he was the one who had asked for the date. When we got there he put in a movie with a lot of female nudity in it, and during the whole movie, he’s still staring at me. I’m really creeped out at this point when he tried to kiss me. His breath stunk and his teeth looked like they hadn’t been brushed in months. I pushed his head away from me and told him to knock it off, but he still tried to kiss me. At that point, I got up and just ran out of there as fast as I could.

Basically, the whole date was one red flag after another, from creepily staring, to using me as a free meal, to choosing a movie that a straight woman would most likely not be interested in, to trying to kiss me despite my protests.”

Honestly, What Were They Thinking?

44) “He talked about all the illegal substances he’s tried pretty much the whole time.”–

45) “He kept staring at my chest and told me that my chest wasn’t as big as it looked in the photos (we met online).”–

46) “We went out to dinner and he said he didn’t believe in tipping but because he wanted to impress me he was making an exception. He tipped our server a dollar.”–

47) “He asked to stick his member in my bellybutton.”–

48) “He had a bunch of pictures from my Facebook saved on his phone. And he showed me.”–

49) “He said his younger twin sisters (I think they were about 2-3ish?) were spoiled rotten and will have everything handed to them in life. Proceeded to say, ‘I would kill them if it was legal.'”

She Was Willing To Look Past The Tattoo, But Not The Rants…

50) “He asked if I had any tattoos and showed me his tattoo, of his fraternity. I was willing to look past that. Then he asked me if I was in a sorority and I said no to which he asked why not. I said it wasn’t my thing and I was really involved on campus without it. He then continued the whole day to talk about how he didn’t understand people who didn’t want to be involved in Greek life because it was so great, and I must have been to scared to go out for a sorority, and insinuated that maybe I had gone out and didn’t get a bid so I was embarrassed.”