We've all seen spoiled kids in the middle of a tantrum with their parents nowhere to be found. Nothing is more satisfying when these little brats get punishment they deserve. Content has been edited for clarity.
The Porcupine Always Wins
“Boy Scout camp out in Utah (when Boy Scouts were pretty much run by the Mormon Church). A porcupine walked through our camp and this spoiled rich kid got a stick and chased it up a tree. We all told him to stop. He wouldn’t listen. Scout leaders were off doing God knows what at the time.
So this porcupine was up the tree and now the spoiled weenie wanted to shoot hard candy at with his wrist rocket. He couldn’t get a clear shot, so he climbed up the tree and sat on a branch under the porcupine. He shot a hard candy at the porcupine and hits it, hard.
It was right then that he learned that when a treed porcupine feels threatened, it just lets go and lets its quills break the fall. The big porcupine fell right onto the spoiled kid’s shoulder, bounced off, hit his thigh and then landed on the ground. It waddled away and we just laughed at the now howling spoiled kid.
One of the scout leaders had to drive the kid to an emergency room. I hope he caught heck for not supervising, too.”
Broke His Spirit Like A Trainer Breaks A Horse’s Spirit
“I used to work at a summer day camp, an after-school program, and a week-long soccer camp. The town isn’t huge so needless to say over a few years, I got to know several kids from different programs. One 10-year-old boy I knew from afterschool care was a total prick. He was a bully, snob, didn’t think he had to listen, and a tattletale. Just awful. He came to my soccer camp and proceeded to make fun of an 8-year-old girl because she had old cleats whereas he had the newest Nike’s and a brand new cool design ball. Unfortunately for him, I also knew this 8-year-old girl and knew that the reason her cleats looked old and worn down was that she was a BEAST, just an all-around amazing athlete who loved soccer and played for hours every day.
I paired him with her for a simple drill where one person started with the ball and you just tried to get past the other person and kick the ball at stationary ball/cone about 10 yards away to simulate passing/scoring accurately while under pressure. He was, of course, angry, saying she was too young and a girl. I said if he hit the cone three times, he could pick his partner. He again pointed out her shoes to me as if that were going to change my mind before giving in and playing.
She proceeded to humiliate him over the next few minutes, not once letting him dribble past her in five attempts. He was LIVID! He kept bending down and messing with laces as if the shoes really mattered, then saying he needed to use his ball. Nothing worked. He was so angry, I thought he was going to be violent but then it was her turn to be on offense.
He talked some kind of smack and refused to let her use his ball. She didn’t say a word, she just got a new ball. I blew the whistle and she did a step over fake which made him move to the side. Then she stood back up straight and kicked it between his legs and hit the cone. She barely even moved. He was so freaking angry. In the second round, he charged her, screaming. She kept her cool, wound back like she was gonna drill it at his dumb face, he ducked and squealed as she dribbled around him with his hands still covering his head and hit the cone. I didn’t make her embarrass him for the remaining three attempts and called a water break.
The kid was just dumbfounded, he honestly thought his shoes were going to make him better without any effort. He behaved better for the rest of the week but honestly, I think she just broke his spirit. He just seemed out of it. Hope he’s doing all right.
The girl is like an all American high school soccer player last I checked, wouldn’t be surprised if I see her in the Olympics one day.”
This Guy Wanted Mac N Cheese So Bad He Got Arrested
“Here at Uconn, they serve special mac n’ cheese on certain days, I’m sure lots of schools do it. But our bacon jalapeno mac is pretty darn good.
Well, a certain sophomore from a wealthy family who is used to being bailed out of trouble by his rich parents got trashed and decided he wanted some mac n’ cheese. He was clearly wasted and had the balls to walk around the food court drinking a cold one. The manager saw this and wouldn’t let him in the food line. So, our boy spent the next 10 minutes mercilessly berating the poor guy and his staff for being beneath him.
The manager gave him so many chances to just walk away, but our boy wasn’t leaving without his mac. He shoved the manager (not for the first time) and another employee decided he’s done with this. Hero employee tackled our boy and pinned him. The moron spent the next few minutes pinned to the ground while the cops arrive, screaming ‘I’M ABSOLUTELY EFFED.’ He was arrested. Not his first arrest, not his first expulsion from a college. From what I hear, he’s since been arrested or expelled from another school.
We’ll never forget you, Mac N’ Cheese kid.”
He Saw His Moment And He Absolutely Went With It
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“When a kid is being a brat in a noisy and public area, I casually get close to them and fart on their head/face. I’m really tall, so it’s usually a direct hit.
I’m about 6’7” so even when I’m just trying to be friendly and meeting a family member’s or friend’s kid for the first time, I’ve noticed they get very intimidated on sight if I’m not sitting down. So it’s not hard for me to silence/intimidate a child, especially when I’m trying to.
However, a few times I’ve been called out. One time I was pretty hammered and with a friend at a Target. This 5-7-year-old with a mohawk was being an insufferable little twerp in the action figure section. I heard him from like five aisles over and it was like nails on a chalkboard. I told my friend, ‘I’m gonna fart on this kid’s head. Watch and learn.’
At the time, I was on a strict Chipotle carnitas burrito diet. And while I was watching all this, my stomach gave me an initial warning gurgle (very courteous stomach) telling me I was about an hour away from punishing the toilet. Serendipity! Destiny!
I inched a bit closer to my prey, inspecting some wrestling toys. The kid shouted ‘I HATE YOU!’ His mom rolled her eyes and turned her back to the kid to ignore him. And could you believe it, the kid got on his hands and knees and started taking the toy out of the box. It’s go time!
I positioned my back towards him and at this point, I was like two feet away from him. His head was down and I went for the kill. I bent down to reach for one of the toys on the lower shelf. At this point, my butt was INCHES away from this kid’s head.
I was so close that from a distance, it looked like I was about to sit on him. My friend saw this happening and could no longer contain himself. He’s covering his mouth, but his ‘hee-haw’ hyperventilating donkey chortle was fairly audible over the late 90’s pop muzak playing on the loudspeakers.
The kid immediately looked up towards the laughter, but couldn’t help but notice there is a butt now directly in his face. Now, I’m trying not to laugh but also panicking as I’d just made eye contact with him. He furled his brow and I looked over in the mother’s direction, still with her back towards us. I relished in the moment and the look on this child’s confused and naive face.
The initial blast was mighty and boisterous. I swear, I saw his hair blowing in the wind (so to speak). If I wasn’t wearing jeans, I think it could have probably blown over an empty soda can. However, what immediately followed that out the chamber was truly horrifying. The fart’s implication changed without notice and swiftly. It went from a joyous, dry airhorn squeal to a nefarious, hissing mephitis. I think the little moppet noticed the hateful metamorphosis before even I did because he wrenched his neck violently trying to get away from the personified evil being fumigated into his soul.
In total, it lasted about four seconds but for that kid, it must have seemed like time was frozen. The long-term severe brain damage which he no doubt suffered only added to that effect.
When I finished with my business there was a silent, pregnant pause. The kid was clearly shocked and stunned. No one had ever stood up to this dwarf sociopath in his whole life. I had taken the words out of his mouth and filled it with a fart.
The mom turned around to see her kid with an open toy, crying on the floor and me minding my own business.
She walked up to him and asks what’s wrong but the kid can’t speak. All he got out is, ‘BAWAWAAAWA FART BAWAWA.’ It took every fiber in my body not to laugh.
Sensing that his assailant was getting away scot-free, he somehow managed to compose himself for a moment. He shouted, ‘HE FARTED ON ME!’ I could feel him pointing at me but I continued to act like I was just browsing.
I was ALMOST around the corner when the mom went, ‘Why did you fart on my son?’
I replied, ‘Because the whole store could hear him being a little, rotten sucker to his mother so I thought I’d come over here and treat him like one.’
The mom looked at me, her son and the scattered GI JOE/wrappers/box on the floor. The mom was puzzled as to what to do and said, ‘Just..just go.’ That’s my cue! I turn around, walk away with a little extra pep in my step.
We laughed on the car ride back about the whole scene. With a slight hint of seriousness in his tone, my friend asks me:
‘Do you do that a lot?’
‘Ahhh, not that much. Like once every 6 months or so.'”
A Stupid Remark Gets An Appropriate Punishment
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“On the first day of a two-week vacation, I saw my spoiled 10-year-old cousin tell his mother, his older female cousin, his aunt and his grandmother that he wasn’t going to clear his place or rinse his dishes because ‘That’s women’s work.’ For the rest of that two-week vacation, nobody had to lift a finger to clear a plate, rinse a dish or wash a pot because it was his job. At times, there were over a dozen of us there.”
Getting The Kid Sent Home From Camp
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“I worked as an outdoor camp instructor. One week I was on logistics and had to drive the van to pick up kids. I had heard from my friend that one of the kids in his group was a little dirtbag, back chatting, lazy, bullying other kids, you name it. When I got to the pickup point, the kids hopped into the van and my mate, Mitch, jumped in the passenger seat. Mitch gave me the run down of the kid. As I started the van up, I did a visual check of seatbelts and everyone was good, except for the kid. I asked, he said no. I told him I couldn’t leave until he put it on. So he did and I started to leave.
A minute down the road, I heard him unclip his seat belt again so I had to stop the van and ask him again. He put it back on. This happened one more time. On the third time, I just pulled over, turned the van off. Radioed base and asked for my manager and the overseeing teacher who was his Dean to come up and pick this kid up because he was a danger to the others in the van.
That’s when this kid started pleading and begging. Told him no. I already made the call. He got sent home. My mate Mitch had one of his best weeks after this kid left.”
This Father Is Serious About Punishment
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“I used to work at a women’s shelter. Christmas time rolled around and a man and his sour-puss teenaged son came to the door. He said his son would like to donate some items to the kids staying at the shelter. Great! The man and his son started hauling in some expensive items. There was an XBox, a bunch of games, a flat screen, an iPod, cool headset, etc. Turns out the kid ran his mouth and the Dad made him give everything to the kids. Christmas was pretty cool for our gang that year.”
He Couldn’t Handle This Contact Sport
“I played football in the local kids league. One kid from another team was basically untouchable as his dad was a major sponsor of the league and would donate money for uniforms, drinks etc.
His son was a pretty good receiver but didn’t like getting hit, and his parents made a big deal of leaving their son alone so he could develop his skills. He was insufferable. Anytime he scored a touchdown, he would do over the top celebrations and mock all the other players, his teammates included.
Then came high school. Most of the kids from the league ended up in one of two schools. He went to mine (as well as some other players).
During tryouts, he did well. The coaches were mostly focused on skills and minimal contact during the first few rounds of cuts.
The final round was when things got interesting. Full contact was permitted and he got rocked over and over again. No one was actually trying to tackle any harder than normal, it’s just this dude didn’t know what to do when he got tackled. So he screamed and cried a lot.
He didn’t make the team.
Until his dad came down to the school and offered to donate money for uniforms and some other goodies for our sports teams.
So he made the team and again we were told to take it easy on him a bit. So we did. But the other teams didn’t. And he went up against some of the players he mocked previously. And they remembered. Our QB kept passing to him and he was getting repeatedly smashed. Over and over again.
It was the only time our team cheered for the other team. He quit playing football after that.”
Instant Karma Is Amazing
“I was about 15. I was in the woods with some friends playing on a rope swing, drinking energy drinks and eating snacks. The rope swing itself was on a very tall tree, hanging over what I can only explain as a miniature valley.
Then some kids came along on their bikes, maybe between 10-12 years old, dressed up in tracksuits and quite mouthy. You know the type.
They told us to move along from ‘their’ rope swing. It wasn’t theirs. I’d set the thing up myself because I was like a spiderman kid back then, I could climb anything. Obviously, we said no, but we did say we’d leave them to it for a bit if they want to have a go. There’s no reason we can’t all enjoy it.
They wouldn’t take that answer, so we carried on playing on the rope swing, but then they began throwing sticks and rocks at us, but it didn’t phase us.
One of them tried to show off and sped down the hill on his bike to try and grab me while I swung, but his mate threw a stick at the same time and it lodged in his wheel and sent him flying down the hill. To add insult to injury, he flew right in my swing path and got two knees to the ribs. Completely took the wind out of him. So they all left, feeling defeated.
It feels good because we did nothing out of order, the cards just worked in our favor.”
There’s No Crying In Lightsaber Battles!
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“We moved into a newly built neighborhood when I was 10, so everyone there had just moved in within about a year. There were a handful of us that were the same age, so we were all trying to make friends with each other at the same time. All of us were on the low end of middle class except for one kid, who was the youngest in his family and his dad had just gotten a 7-figure dismemberment settlement from an accident. He got whatever he wanted from that point forward.
He would flex on us (even though none of us called it that) whenever he could and ended up being one of the worst bullies I had growing up. But one time when we were 11, Attack of the Clones was about to come out and we were all hyped about buying toy lightsabers and fighting with them. Four or five of us were playing in my house’s unfinished basement and Spoiled Kid kept bragging about his more-expensive lightsaber and how it would destroy ours in a fight while sitting on the side and not actually fighting anyone. We all got sick of it and called him out on it, and he came in to fight me and my $9 Qui-Gon saber. 10 seconds in, I accidentally hit his fingers (which happened constantly in these fights) and he immediately started screaming and crying. The rest of us got silent, shocked at how much he was overreacting. He threw his saber across the room and ran out of the house.
He kept being a garbage pile until we both graduated and moved away, but for a long while, no one would let him forget what a whiny baby he was at lightsaber fighting.”
What Not To Do When A Bird Poops On You
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“I had a high school drama class right after lunch. The classroom had its own entrance outside of the building instead of through the halls, so usually, a few students would wait outside until the teacher arrived to unlock it. My mother still made a lunch for me most days, and she insisted on including a very plain bologna sandwich about once a week, and I lost any taste I may have had for these when I was younger. Sometimes, students would throw things like bread crusts on the roof of this classroom to watch pigeons and seagulls swarm and fight over it. So, I just tossed the whole sandwich up one day. The swarm was instantaneous and it was loud.
By now, most of the class was waiting to be let in as the teacher was late. There was one incredibly spoiled classmate… combine the heavyset build, blonde hair, and narcissism of Miss Piggy with the gum-smacking nastiness of Parker Posey in Dazed And Confused, and you had this creature. She announced her arrival that day with a blood-curdling scream from around the corner… like, Dario Argentina-style terror. I thought someone got stabbed until this girl came tearing around the corner and we realized no one’s following her with a butcher knife or anything.
She was gagging and flapping her arms to draw attention (heh) to the gob of seagull poop caught dangling in her bangs, inches in front of her forehead. This was about 1989-1990. These were Debbie Gibson-styled bangs teased and sprayed into a popular clamshell-like fan shape. This girl had enough hairspray to not only hold the hair up in front but mostly support the weight of a large seagull dump, except it was starting to fold over in front. She went cross-eyed for a second, trying to focus on the wet-green-grey poop, then vomited in front of everyone and ran to the bathroom to clean up. The moment she left, the teacher arrived and asked why everyone’s laughing.”
All He Could Think Of Was How Hard His Mom Had Worked…
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“We were poor growing up. Like ham OR cheese sandwich poor.
When I was 13, I asked my single mother to combine Christmas and birthday gifts, with my birthday being in March. I had wanted a nice bike for years but didn’t want to ask for anything specific. I was happy with any gift. I asked very respectfully for a Dyno Compe bicycle. My awesome mom delivered and in March, I got my favorite present of all time.
Within three or four days, my best friend and his little brother (whom of course, were very well off) showed up at my house both with higher end freestyle bikes. We went for a ride and the brothers ended up grazing each other and created a scratch on the older brothers bike. He was furious and slammed his own bike on the ground then knocked his little brother over and commenced to stomping every spoke out of both wheels. The younger brother returned the favor on the other bicycle. They then actually had a contest to see who could destroy a bicycle more drastically.
This was the first time I think my jaw dropped and I was speechless. Once I regained my orientation, I just turned and pedaled away. I immediately started crying at why kids would trash brand new bicycles.
They both showed up that weekend with two new bikes. I made up some lie and said that I was grounded. I couldn’t be friends with someone like that anymore. I just thought, ‘My mom worked so hard for my bike and these guys destroyed $800.’ If my mom knew, I wouldn’t even be allowed to be friends with them.”
The Kid Loses His Phone When He Has A Fit
“I work in an Apple Store as a Genius. A kid (13-15 yrs old) comes in with his iPhone X and tells me that he wants a new phone now. I ask him what is wrong and he says everytime he plays Fortnite or Minecraft, his phone gets hot. I explain to him that is an expected behavior for graphic-intensive games and explain that I play too and my phone does the same thing.
He screams, ‘I want a new freaking phone now!’ And slams the phone on the table, which shatters the display. The phone drops to the floor (which is stone) and shatters the back. He looks at me and blames me for making him slam his phone.
I tell him, ‘Well now the phone is broken and that will be $549 to replace it.’ At this point, his mom comes in and sees the phone and asks what happens. Her son starts to say that I did it. She looks at me and asks what happened. I tell her and she laughs and tells her son to get the heck out and he will be without a phone until he can pay for it himself.”
The Father That Can Do Anything Does The Nicest Thing Possible
“I was working at a Chuck E Cheese one year.
Some little kid kept getting angry because he couldn’t win many tickets from a game. The kid began to kick and scream, toss things around, etc. I think he tried to hit one of the animatronics. When someone tried to get him to stop, he pulled the, ‘DO YOU KNOW WHO MY DAD IS? DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE CAN DO TO YOU?’
We all just shook our heads and didn’t know what to say. Was his dad the owner? Rich? Chuck?
‘Tell me what I can do,’ boomed a voice from behind us.
We saw this guy in a business suit just standing there with a really upset look on his face. It was the kind of face that you look at and wonder if this man ever smiled. The kid just froze up and muttered something.
The man apologized and walked away. He came back a few hours later and gave all the employees gifts. I got an Xbox 360.”