Sometimes when guys try to be nice, they're actually being super creepy. Guys, if you're reading this, take notes. Don't be creepy.
How Do You Tell Him to Shut Up?
I have spent so much time waiting in checkout lines behind older men who are just so pleased to have the captive audience of a young female cashier that they forget that people are in line behind them. It’s always so uncomfortable, and I want to yell “she’s only tolerating you because she’s at work!” (Source)
So Are All Those Girls Coming on Our Date?
I don’t know any girls that actually like the “I was/could be with all these other girls but I couldn’t stop thinking about you” line. Telling you how perfect and amazing you are excessively after you just met. Also, talking about how nice they are. (Source)
Rule No. 1: Ask Before Touching
I had a guy one a first date who just started massaging my back (Which if he had asked, I would never say no to, but he didn’t ask.),anyways, he is was too hard and rough and hurt a ton. So I asked him to either stop or lighten the pressure and he got offended because he was only trying to be nice (Source)
What Do You Mean, “It’s Not Safe”?
A stranger I just met offering to walk me home because it’s not safe to walk home alone. There’s no nice way to say, “But, you could be a rapist. Plus, now I know you know I’m walking home alone and you could follow me.” (Source)
When You Say That, I Know All About You, Too
I will say this; Girls do not care for the “I know all about you type”, believe it or not! Some people just like knowing who they are one-step at a time. (Source)
Maybe I Want Protection From You
Following me to my car/house/next class when I say I’m fine. You may think it’s protective of me, but I said no and YOU might actually be what I’m trying to get away from. (Source)
Did People Even Call This Stalking Back in the Day?
I had an aged relative who used to tell the story of how her husband (then of some 50 years), had first asked her out over the phone (she was a telephone operator), and then continued to call back and ask to speak with her (so he could ask her on a date), over and over again for months until she agreed to go out with him. He then asked her to marry him (and was rejected) some seven or eight times before she agreed. I’ve never heard this story and thought “Aww, that’s sweet.” On the contrary, it always felt weird, pathetic and stalkerish… and left me wondering whether social norms had changed, or if my relative had just developed Stockholm syndrome over the years. (Source)
If I Don’t Text Back, There’s a Reason
Calling me after a rapid fire of excessive texts that I don’t answer. I don’t know if this qualifies as nice but twice I’ve been at work with my phone away and when I’ve comeback to it have a slew of texts asking where I am/what am I doing/am I okay followed by a phone call. Damn son I’m working chill out. (Source)
Honk If You Hate When Guys Do This
Getting honked at/stopping your car to talk to me while I’m out running. Also telling me I’m “too pretty to have a boyfriend” when I’m out with friends. What the f_ck does that even mean? (Source)
Yeah, That’s a No
Had this exchange while out eating alone (I like alone time): Guy: You’re not married? Me: Nope. G: Beautiful girl like you not married? Me: Still no. G: Can I buy you a drink? Me: I don’t drink. G: Can I get you an iced tea? Me: No thank you. G: We should hang out next time you come around here. Me: I’m not in this area often. G: So is that a “no” then? Me: painfully awkward stare. (Source)
Put Me Down, Dammit!
Physically picking me up without notice. I’m lucky, being taller than average and heavier than I look, so it doesn’t happen a ton to me, but I’ve known a lot of short, petite women that deal with this on the regular. (Source)
“You’re Just Like My Wife, Only Pretty”
A guy I work with that’s close to my dad’s age constantly talks about how I look like his wife did when she was younger , but that she’s not pretty like me anymore. I find it super odd. Also, I’m a super un-touchy person with people I work with, especially the men. The same guy forced me into a hug (he’s at least twice my size) and wouldn’t let me go because “(insert other female coworkers name here) let’s me hug her so why don’t you?” And then later called me a b_tch because I told him to let me go (Source)
All I’m Delivering Here is Pizza
I work part time at a restaurant that’s huge for delivery orders. The amount of guys who ask me out over the phone is extremely uncomfortable. I’m not flirting. I’m just being polite and trying to get your order. Guys will frequently say stuff like “I’m sorry but you just have a sexy/pretty voice and I wanted to let you know.” It’s inappropriate and so unnecessary. I have to ask for their phone number so the delivery driver can call them and they’ll say stuff like “Only if I can get yours!” Or “You have my address. You should stop by after work. When do you get off?” What the f_ck you have no idea what I look like! I could be ugly as hell. My least favorite is when I ask “Anything else I can help you with?” and they reply “Depends, can you be delivered with the pizza?” Whenever I get upset or don’t respond well to these remarks, they always insist they’re just trying to be nice. (Source)
Catcalling is a No-No, Mkay?
Catcalling. I don’t care if think you’re complimenting me. If you really cared about complimenting me you would approach me like a normal person and say something, not yell about how long my legs are from across the street. (Source)
Who Cares If I’m Smiling?
Asking why I’m not smiling and telling me to be happy. Maybe I’m fine and relaxed and enjoying myself and just don’t feel like smiling. Maybe it’s none of your goddamn business either way. I was operating a camera at a concert recently, right at the edge of the stage. The singer actually stopped his show to come over and ask me why I wasn’t smiling. Ummm I’m working, you old prick. I’m not here to entertain you, nor am I here to be entertained by you. I’m here to make money and go home, so leave me out of your show and let me focus on my job. (Source)
This Wins a Prize for Creepy
This one guy sent me a video of him doing kinky stuff with other people – he thought it would be a turn on for me and make me want him. I thought it was a weird thing to do, especially because he and I had just met and were not dating. (Source)
No White Knights Here, Please
When someone speaks in absolutes romantically about you when you aren’t even dating, especially upon hearing a woman being “mistreated” to try to impress. I hate these even from a partner, but it is 100x worse from a creeper. “I would never leave you.” “I would always treat you right.” “I would never do that to you.” Also, any form of “white knighting”. (Source)
What Do You Really Love About Me?
Giving too many physical compliments compared to non-physical compliments (e.g. hobbies, personality, job). There should be a balance of the two, otherwise it feels like all you like about or want from me is my body. And using pet names (e.g. cutie, baby) before we’re actually dating. I find it so cheesy and gross. (Source)
Let’s Define the Word “Friend”
Randomly adding me on Facebook and trying to “develop a friendship, maybe more” and then not getting the hint that I prefer making friends outside of Facebook and keep texting me. Honestly, it is not cool or modern, I find it rather disturbing when I receive random friend requests from people I haven’t even one common friend with. (Source)
No, You Can’t Run Your Hands Through It — Literally
Touching my hair. I get it- I have hair like that girl from Brave – it’s pretty awesome. It’s also tangly as f_ck and you WILL get caught in it. Also why the f_ck are you touching me without permission? (Source)
Never Say, “I Can Hide the Body”
Went on a date last week with a guy who kept telling me he had a working with children check and a gun license (in Australia this isn’t something most people have). He insisted that made him the safest guy in Australia. I suppose he was trying to make me feel comfortable, and if he had said it once it might have been a little weird and not creepy, but he said it multiple times. It felt like he was trying to get me to let my guard down. Throw in the fact that he kept talking about his big family farm that backs onto a national park and that he could ‘take care of’ my horrible ex and no one would find the body… I was more than a little creeped out. Suffice to say I won’t be seeing him again. (Source)
When Concern Turns to Stalking
Constantly asking me if “I’m okay” and “You can tell me anything”. I share several classes with a male friend and we live in the same dorm building as well. I’m usually pretty talkative, but some days I just don’t feel like socializing. There’s been a couple days where said friend kept asking me “What’s wrong”, that “I can tell him anything”, and that “He will always be there for me”. Once, fine. I appreciate it. But he asked TWELVE times in a 50min class, followed by texting me all day with same questions (“I KNOW something was wrong, just tell me”) and even coming down to my floor to knock on my door and ask me again. I felt very oppressed. I appreciate people asking me what’s wrong, but if I specifically say “Just don’t feel like talking today, ya know?” You need to back off. (Source)
“No” Really Means… (Can You Guess?)
Thinking I’m playing hard to get. No means no, this isn’t a creepy romantic comedy. (Source)
Too Much “Yes” Is Also Unattractive
Agreeing with everything I say. I have a male friend who does this – never disagrees with me, never brings up any controversial topics, always expresses interest in what I express interest in even if I know he doesn’t like it, never talks about his hobbies, and basically matches himself to me in every way he can. I know he thinks he’s relating to me and trying to make sure I like him, but it comes off as a f_ckboi move. A “I want to stay in your good graces so you’ll let me hit that”. A “I’m so insecure in myself that I feel like I need to conform myself to this girl so she’ll like me”. It’s very creepy. Not to the “going to wear your skin as a suit” point of creepy, but the “I’m secretly stalking you and copying what you do” point of creepy (Source)
You Can’t Make This One Up
Not exactly “creepy” but a lot of guys are convinced that telling a girl that she doesn’t need “all that makeup” is one of the nicest things you can say to a girl. Don’t get me wrong, it can be super nice for girls who genuinely think they need makeup or won’t go out in public without it. But if a girl is wearing really dark makeup or makeup that is obviously not very natural, we’re probably not wearing it because we feel self conscious without it. Makeup is an artistic outlet for a lot of women and personally, it’s the one thing I do in the mornings a few days a week that is really fun for me and it’s frustrating when guys can’t see it as anything more than a girl trying to look prettier. Believe me- I know I probably look more conventionally attractive without bright purple eyeshadow but I don’t really care because it’s so fun to put on! (Source)