Planning a wedding takes so much time and effort it will drive you crazy at some point along the way. Mostly because you need this one event in your life to be perfect. No wedding is going to happen without at least one problem, even if it's the smallest thing. This is why when one of your guests decides to be that one problem it's a huge problem that you'll never forget.
Party Crasher
“Skipped my bridal shower and bachelorette party, but found time to go (uninvited) to the strip club with my husband, his friends, and her boyfriend, who was a groomsman. Came to my wedding dressed as a hooker and congratulated me by saying she thought it would be her getting married first. We’re obviously not friends anymore, and these aren’t even the main reasons for that.”
Citizens’ Arrest
“I was a bridesmaid at this wedding. The groom’s ex girlfriend (who was not invited) snuck into the church, and as the bride and groom were exchanging vows, started smashing dishes and throwing pots and pans around the church kitchen in the basement. Groom’s sister dragged her outside and sat on her until the cops came. You can clearly hear the smashing on the wedding video.”
Delayed Wedding
“She deliberately took forever to get ready and started a fight with her boyfriend (My husband’s best friend and best man) right before the wedding. They showed up late because of the whole thing, which caused our whole wedding ceremony to be 20 minutes late. It is well known that she doesn’t like me, so it was obviously a power play and done on purpose. She then didn’t talk to me once during the entire wedding. It felt very awkward. I have one photo of me on the dance floor and she is in the background giving me the worst stink eye.”
Not Invited
“I get angry just thinking about this. It was my husband’s best friend’s mom, who was not invited, but showed up anyway, and brought a bunch of small children with her (it was explicitly a no-kids, no-exceptions wedding), tried to sit at the same table as me and tried to take pictures of me while I was eating, and loudly criticized one of the caterers because she thought she saw him put a used spoon into a buffet dish (he didn’t). My mom, who is pretty blunt, straight up asked her ‘who are you and why are you here? I personally addressed all the invitations and I know we didn’t invite you’. To which she replied ‘well my son needed a ride!’. My mom told her to leave, which was so unbelievably awkward, but she left without making more of a scene.”
Wedding Dresses
“Came up to me at the reception and said…’omg wow your dress is stunning! I mean, my wedding dress is my favorite wedding dress of course and is way prettier than anyone elses (as she looked me up and down) but I ACTUALLY like yours!’ (The emphasis on the actually sounded like she was surprised I could look good in a dress)”
Behind My Back
“My mother in law changed our reception venue behind my back. Luckily, I found out and was able to get it changed back. This was my first introduction to her boundary issues. I have since learned that if she thinks there is even the slightest chance that someone won’t do what she wants, then she feels completely entitled to use whatever means necessary to get her way. I think she legitimately believes that people who won’t do what she wants are purposely being mean to her. She also passed out dollar store glow necklaces at our reception. She didn’t ask me or anything, of course. It was a complete surprise to see her handing out glow necklaces as wedding favors.”
Destination Wedding
“My sister’s wedding was a bit over the top but beautiful (castle, south of France, need I say more). She had this group of friend who all put some money in an envelope as a present. One girl, the new girlfriend of one of the boys, said something like ‘I don’t have a lot to give and feel embarrassed to put my participation in front of you’ so she took the envelope in the loo and added her money there, away from ‘judging’ eyes. Yep, you guessed it, she took more than €500 from the envelope. They only find out when one of those friends asked, weeks later, if the newlyweds had enjoyed the €1000 during the honeymoon. The girl’s excuse was that she was planning her own wedding and could just afford a city hall affair and it was soooo unfair my sister had such a great venue. I’m personally quite immune to ‘princess wedding day’ but stealing money at a wedding is so so wrong. I think the girl ended up as a bit of a cast away. My sister’s marriage didn’t last anyway so I don’t know what happened to her group of friends but I often think of this girl and imagine her as one of life’s constantly unhappy and envious.”
Plus Eleven
“At my brother’s wedding, his mother-in-law sat her ELEVEN last-minute guests at our guest’s table because she clearly did not give a f–k about my family’s guests. We couldn’t add another table because we were at the max tables that would fit in the venue. So I had to ask the reception venue staff to add chairs to our other tables (which overcrowded our other tables and f–ked up our seating chart), his mother-in-law cuts me off saying ‘No, you cannot have 13 people to a table. It’s unlucky.’ THEN B–CH, WHY DID YOU STEAL OUR TABLE???? HUH??? YOU F–KING DUMBA– SUPERSTITIOUS B–CH. What the hell were we supposed to do??? Ask our guests to leave???? I completely ignored her, turned to the staff member, and had them add the chairs anyway. Okay, I’m done ranting.”
Neon
“Can the b–ch be more a son of a…? He came up to the head table and stated, ‘you don’t know me do you?’ (I didn’t). ‘I’m [my aunts] husband.’ I hadn’t seen my aunt in years and this was her latest husband. He then proceeded to pull a couple cans of some energy drink out and give my husband and I a sales pitch, asking if we’d invest in the company. Apparently his trunk was full of cases of the stuff. My photographer got a photo of the cans, thinking we had brought them for ourselves. When we told her the story, she was crying with laughter over the whole debacle. It was called ‘neon’. No clue if he still sells it, since I have distanced myself even further from that side of the family for I hope obvious reasons.”
Skinny Jeans
“Maid of honor. She missed the ceremony rehearsal the day before because she was too busy trying to get my father in law to buy skinny jeans at a Macy’s on the way to the venue. She ended up being 4 hours late. Before the ceremony, she made a scene at the resort spa bc she didn’t like her makeup, resulting in the makeup artist leaving in tears. Other people couldn’t get their makeup done because the spa had to pull in another makeup artist with limited time. Then, she wouldn’t stop b–ching about her makeup while I was trying to calmly get ready in my room. At the reception, she kept hitting on the men, including the married ones. At the after party in a friend’s suite, she made out with and rubbed the crotch of a guy in front of everyone. Her constant need to be center of attention is one of the many reasons we don’t talk that much anymore.”
I Will Cut Her
“If I wasn’t around, she was hanging off of my husband and trying to get him to only pay attention to her and do shots. They don’t talk now, because I will cut her.”
Bonus Dad
“My mother. My SO and I ended up doing a court house type marriage. Did the papers, found someone to marry us, went to her office to do it. The only people there were my ex step dad (I call him bonus dad), mom, aunt, uncle, and grandmother. My mom was my maid of honor, bonus dad was my SOs best man. Right in the middle of our vows, my mom ‘breaks down’ sobbing, interrupting everything. The b–ch is obviously trying to get the attention on her since she can’t seem to stand not being the middle of everything. We try to continue over her ‘sobbing’ but only starts crying louder. My aunt, being the amazing person she is, grabbed the ring from my mom pushed her towards my uncle who pretty much dragged her outside. Aunt quickly announced she’s the maid of honor now, which I was completely fine with and the vows carried on. After signing everything we go out to get to the car and my mom is just furious at me for ‘letting your aunt do that!’ I just ignored her and went to the car. On the upside, when we were saying our vows, bonus dad started tearing up. It made me happy because it was super unlike him. Kinda guy who never says ‘I love you’ because that’s just him, ex 1st sergeant, served from 1972 to 2007 manly man. I love you bonus dad! F–k you mom!”
Don’t Wear White
“She wore white and spent the entire time talking about her own upcoming wedding. Her second wedding. eye roll”
NFL Caliber Tackle
“Her jacka– cousin tackled her (the bride) in her wedding dress. I approached him and asked something like ‘why did you do that? She’s in her dress.’ He looked down, walked away to leave and muttered ‘I was just f–king around.'”
Little Guy Big Mouth
“Not a b–ch, a c–t. Little guy big mouth was a really close friend until at my wedding he stood in front of my mum when we were cutting the cake and proceeded to give her the finger when she asked him to move over a little. Just after that while my dad was taking photos of me and my wife cutting the cake he keeps nudging my dad’s arm so he would get a shaky photo, my dad gave him a swift elbow to say f–kin stop, then said c–t stamps on my dad’s foot, my dad loses it, pushes him out of the door to my father in law, who then pushes him further outside to his brother who is an big guy and an ex bouncer, Picks him up by the collar and slaps him around the face a couple of times and drops him on the floor, cops were called because he wouldn’t calm down and had a night in the cells. I don’t speak to him anymore, If you are reading this Ricky, you are a c–t.”
Not Lucky
“I have a couple, unfortunately. My first marriage didn’t go very well. At the wedding, I had a rented tux on and I asked my new wife not to smear cake on me when we cut the cake because of that. Of course, when the time came, it wasn’t just a cute smear of frosting or something like you’d see at most weddings, oh no…she full on plastered me with cake and and a mess of frosting and food coloring. I don’t know what was worse, being angry and hurt and embarrassed when the whole room was watching or when people were pulling me aside later and apologizing for it when her and her parents were still laughing and making jokes about it a couple of hours later. I thankfully remarried a great person years later, and we had a small ceremony that was really very nice. Our photographer was taking pictures afterward before we were heading to the reception, and I had been talking to my dad when he started so he just took our picture together first. My mom, being who she is, was incensed by not being first to get her picture taken when she wanted and proceeded to throw a fit and leave (my parents had been divorced for at least a decade or so prior to this). Maybe a couple of minutes later, we were all lining up and getting family together for pictures, and when I couldn’t find my mom I learned that she’d stormed off and left. On what would otherwise be one of the best days of my life, there’ll always be that storm cloud of pettiness that she left behind because she couldn’t handle putting one of her kids ahead of herself for ten minutes worth of time.”
What A Speech
“Not mine but my friend’s brother’s rather religious wedding. Bride’s mother makes a speech and says deadpan ‘if you hurt her, I will slit your throat’… in her speech… at the wedding where her daughter is marrying the nicest guy… Everyone was so stunned and embarrassed, no one laughed, bride and groom could barely look at her.”
Wow How Rude
Everyone was the b–ch. I had a destination wedding and paid for people to come. People only stayed about an hour at our reception and took off to do tourists stuff. My husband and I spent the majority of our reception alone. We paid out a lot of money to make sure people had fun and they all left. 10 years later and it still pisses me off.
Craving Attention
“My uncle. He made a scene about how his doctor had misdiagnosed his ‘mental illness’ (he doesn’t have one. He’s an attention whore and claims he has every disease/disorder under the sun) for years, how he was going to sue them, etc. He literally stood up and made a speech about it. We had a very small wedding (only be about 40 guests) so it was completely inappropriate.”
Cousin’s Wedding
“Not my wedding, but my cousins. Her best friend kept jumping into every picture she could and she’d stick her middle finger up at the camera in every picture. And then she tried to make out with the groom. No one has heard from her since the wedding.”
Dirty Dress
“My sister’s wedding. The groom’s grandma and female cousins (parents are deceased) wiped their feet on my sister’s dress train during pictures, then stole all the bottles of wine that had the labels customized to read the wedding vows of the groom’s parents, then proceeded to bring back hard liquor, do shots, and grind on the DJ while he was playing bass-booming hip hop that my sister and her husband explicitly said they didn’t want. After those shenanigans, they also threatened to physically assault my sister and my mother. My sister didn’t confront them because she didn’t want to give them the pleasure of seeing her hurt or angry on her wedding day. The groom is no contact with his cousins, and low contact with his grandparents. My sister hasn’t seen any of them since the wedding. The grandma wasn’t doing any grinding, but the groom found out later that she orchestrated the whole thieving of the wine bottles, which occurred while my mom and sisters stepped away after the ceremony, because the woman who was going to perform was dying in hospice, and we needed to say goodbye. My sister is white, my BIL is black, and I don’t think his family is racist, I just don’t think they liked my sister.”
Drunk Speech
“She got super drunk, gave a speech during the ceremony where she was apparently ‘channeling’ my dead mom, whom she had never even met, saying how ‘proud’ my mom was of me. Then later, during the actual reserved time for speeches, she again, uninvited, shared the story of when I met my husband and how I actually wasn’t interested in him bc I was trying to f–k his friend at the time. She didn’t say ‘trying to f–k’ but she may as well have. It’s totally true but did she have to announce it to my entire group of wedding guests!? What a nightmare! We are not friends anymore.”
Don’t Wear White
“I know a girl who wore white consistently to all of the weddings she was invited to one wedding season. She was also very aggressive at all of the bouquet tosses. So much secondhand cringe!”
How Trashy
“Showed up in a trashy version of my bridesmaid’s dress and brought an uninvited guest. Joke’s on her, everyone though she was a complete idiot to try and do that and someone actually told her later that it was super sh-tty.”
Multiple Incidents
“Oh my God I have three different ones. Tell me which is the worst: my mother refused to wear the color that I asked her to wear, which my mother-in-law and all my bridesmaids wore and which matched my table decorations. Instead she were a sparkly silver sequined gown which had the express purpose of upstaging the bride (me). Then my sister-in-law threw a hissy fit because when we went into a small room with the Rabbi for a blessing only the wedding party was allowed to come. It was supposed to be intimate and a small, hence the small room. Since sister-in-law couldn’t come she didn’t let her husband who was a groomsman (my husband’s brother) come either and made a big noisy stink about it. Third, my husband’s cousin somehow got the band to honor her for her birthday with a long speech and a special dance for her and her husband even though it was also my cousins birthday and was also my best friends anniversary and it was my f–king wedding not her birthday party. Overall my wedding was magnificent but they were definitely three b–ches there.”
Drama Queen
“Mother-In-Law left immediately following the ceremony. She loves to be over the top and dramatic. She didn’t even say anything to my wife before doing so. We only found out when it was time to take pictures that she left. Missed all the photos and the reception and never gave her a reason. She hasn’t spoken to her daughter in over two years. Most likely blames everyone else for her problems rather than herself. It blows my mind.”
That’s Excessive
“My brother’s fiancé cheated on him and was surprised when she found out she would no longer be a bridesmaid at my wedding. She tried to make it a big deal about how I betrayed her and the entire time my mind was screaming, ‘I can’t translate the whore pouring out of your mouth!’ She was not a bridesmaid and my friends and I lit her dress on fire.”
My Uncle The Photographer
“My uncle went around taking photos and getting people’s names and addresses to ‘send them the photos’. A month later, he sent out photos, printed on an advertisement for his fly by night ‘prepaid legal’ business, along with hard sell marketing material. So basically, he lied about what he was doing to get people’s contact info for his business. Pretty pissed off about that one.”
Relgious Issues
“Wife and I are both Christians. She’s Catholic and I’m Southern Baptist. That said, we decided to have a non-church wedding. A lot of our friends adhere to various faiths and some none at all, and we wanted every to feel welcome and comfortable. One of her aunts said she would not attend the wedding because it was against God and the Church. (She was also never really happy with my ethnicity) So the f–k what, right? Well, she shows up at the wedding and takes it upon herself to read a long winded passage from the Bible. My wife, being the kind hearted angel she is, told me to just let her have her moment. But I was furious with this because we specifically said we didn’t want this. I mean, yeah, she gave us like $5,000 afterwards but it’s the principle of the damn thing.”
Terrible Maid of Honor
“Maid of Honor at my wedding. The ceremony went off without any problems and she was actually a huge help with setting everything up and organizing most of the day. During the cocktail hour afterwards she gets absolutely smashed and then punches her boyfriend in the face, then somehow convinces him he has been kicked out and has to leave. (I spoke to the owner and the bartenders and told them not to serve her any more alcohol at this point but they didn’t think it was an issue yet.) As soon as her boyfriend is out of the parking lot she drags one of my groomsmen to bathroom and gives his skin flute a thorough cleaning. Manages to get more drunk because she was tipping the bartender a lot. She then stumbles onto dance floor during my wife’s dance with her father. I managed to stop her before any real interruption happens to the dance, but she then tries to kiss me in front of everyone, I kinda push/drop her and she hits the floor like I’ve shot out both her knee caps and starts crying hysterically. My mother in law runs over and drags this stupid b–ch out of the reception hall all the while she is shrieking like a banshee because ‘I threw her to the ground’. Everything is good for around 2 hours while the Trash bin of honor is no where to be seen… until the owner of the golf course taps me on the shoulder and asks to speak to me outside in private. I go outside and see her boyfriend has returned, who I didn’t mind seeing there because I actually liked him, but his face is panicked and he just starts apologizing for something. I was pretty drunk so it took me a few seconds to realize the tire marks all over the 9th green leading up to the golf cart about 90% submerged in the pond right beside the green. Wasn’t to concerned about her dumb a– but unfortunately she was still alive and thrashing around trying to get out of the pond. I just laughed and told the owner I wasn’t paying a single cent for any damages. I told them to stop serving her hours previous and to call the police and have her charged for destroying the green and driving the cart into the pond. Surprisingly he was very understanding of my point of view and we worked together to get everything sorted out. She ended up owing him just over 15 grand ( 8 or 9 for the cart and the rest was to fix the green and lost wages for him not being able to offer people a full 18 holes of golf.) Her parents just paid for all of it and she is currently on a ‘soul searching adventure’ in Asia. Despite all this my wedding was still the most amazing day of my life and my wife actually thought most of what happened was pretty funny in a Jerry Springer dumpster donkey kind of way. I’m just glad my wife’s day wasn’t ruined by it and my best friend, who she blew, has one hell of a story for all of his friends about my wedding. Basically she got Drunk, assaulted someone, blowjob someone, more drunk, tries to kiss me, cries like a baby, steals golf cart, destroys 9th hole, crashes into pond, parents bail her out.”