Some dates are so bad, people don't have a choice but to walk out before they can end. Bad dates are terrible to sit through at the time, but they can make for the best stories. These Quora users have shared their miserable dates they've walked out on and turned them into words of advice and inspiration. Content has been edited for clarity.
"I was 21 years old at the time. I have Asperger's Syndrome, so my interests and behavior have always been a tad eccentric. Not creepy, just unusual. Back then, I'd been repeatedly instructed (by parents, doctors, therapists) to never disclose my condition to anyone, so I kept it to myself and everyone thought I was just weird and clumsy. Anyway, I signed up onto one of those online dating sites. Usually, dates were cordial and most guys were nice, but there was hardly ever any chemistry with any of them, so they'd bring me back home, give me a kiss on the cheek or shake my hand, and I'd never hear from them again. No hard feelings. But there was this one guy...
He came to my house to pick me up for our date. I lived with my parents, who follow rather conservative traditions. They insisted on meeting anyone I was going out with, and this guy was no exception. I had told him that they're like this, and he seemed okay with it. But as he was helping me into his van, he grumbled something about 'who does that anymore?'
As soon as we were underway, he criticized what I was wearing, saying I was 'overdressed'. I was dressed normally (a white long-sleeved blouse paired with black culottes and a gold and red sash), my hair was done normally (two buns with ponytails), and a tiny bit of makeup. I was a little annoyed, but decided to laugh it off with a joke and said, 'sorry, my evening gown is at the dry cleaners'! He was not amused.
So we went out to eat first. He chose a rather expensive restaurant and insisted on paying my way. I had no problem with this, though I asked him if any item on the menu was off limits. He said no, that whatever I wanted was fine. So I ordered the salmon, which wasn't exactly cheap, but it was the only thing on the menu I could tolerate. We talked about hobbies and jobs, past histories and interests. We laughed and joked. Things were starting to go well and I was glad I'd overlooked the bad first impression. Then I told him that one of my favorite activities is doing research at the library. He told me that sounded very boring. I felt that was rude of him, but kept that to myself, figuring it was just another fluke.
Then we headed out to the movie theater. He suggested a horror movie. Back then, I didn't have much of a tolerance for scary things. I was more into animated musicals, like Disney. I told him this, but added that since he was paying, it was his decision. I gave him the heads up that I tend to scream when I'm scared and that I have been known to grab the person sitting next to me. He told me that's why he chose a scary movie — he liked to snuggle and hoped I would cling to him. Well, I did scream in the movie. Several times. At one point, I wrapped my arms around him. He laughed, removed my hands from him and placed them in my lap. Then he moved over a seat and told me to stay. I was very confused.
The ride back home was quiet. Whenever I said anything, he just said, 'shh!' So I took the hint. His driving had become increasingly erratic and he was speeding. He was beginning to scare me. He pulled up in front of my house, put the car in park and sat there, staring straight ahead, fingers drumming on the steering wheel. I sat there, waiting for him to get out, help me out of the van and see me safely to the front door. After an awkward moment, I started to thank him for a lovely evening (it hadn't been, but I wanted to be polite and signal to him that I really was going to need help) but he said 'shh!' and waved his hand at me. I had never been in this situation before and I froze, trying to figure out what was going on and worrying about how I was going to get out of his van. (It was a high enough step that I needed some assistance getting in and out. I have extremely poor gross motor coordination, along with low muscle tone and am prone to tripping over my own feet.) He cleared his throat, like he was about to speak, so I leaned in to hear what he had to say. Instead of saying anything, he took out a smoke, then made a croaking sound. It sounded like a belch, so I said, 'excuse me?' He then screamed 'GET! OUT! NOW!'
I nodded, opened the door and did my best to climb out. As I was getting out, I tried to salvage some decorum, so I started to say, 'well, I had a really nice ti-' and before I could get both feet firmly on the ground, he floored the accelerator, and ran over my foot. I'm lucky my hand didn't get caught in the door. I tripped and fell in the gutter. I stayed there for a good five minutes trying to figure out what the heck just happened.
So that's my date from the underworld. I still wonder what on earth was wrong with that guy or if I did anything wrong. Even if I did do something wrong, I don't believe I deserved to be run over and left laying in a gutter. Some day, I hope I come across his account of our date. It would be interesting to see things from his side."
"I set up a date with this one woman. We’re both working professionals, in our 30s, etc so I can’t chalk her behavior up to youth or lack of social interaction. Though, this was a few years back so I don’t quite remember what she did for a living. Anyway.
We set a lunch date about halfway in between both our workplaces (~10 min away from each of us). I showed up 5 min early, and the place we chose can get pretty packed for lunch - meaning if you get there later, you’ll be waiting a while for food. Well….she texts me and says stuck in a meeting running a little late. Ok, no prob - I grab a table and sit down to wait. About 20 min later I ask her for an ETA….she says 15 min. Ok, I get it, meetings run over, 15 min is still not a horrible delay given travel time + 15 min delay from the meeting. Another 20 min goes by….call her - 'hey, where are you…?' etc. She’s driving and 'almost there'. Oook….she finally arrived about 10 min later. For those of you adding it up, that’s about an hour late. Not a great start.
Fortunately, it wasn’t a sit-down type of place, so I wasn’t wasting a waiter/waitress’s time and tips to wait for her. We went up to order our food finally and she offered to buy lunch as an apology for being late. Ok… I’m flexible. Means I’ll stay a bit later at work but I could take a 2 hour lunch at the time. We eat, sit down, start chatting…annnnnd she starts asking me about my time in the military.
'So, did you go overseas?'
'Yes, I spent a few years overseas in Korea and Iraq/Kuwait.'
'Oh cool!' (Not the way I’d describe it, but ok…) 'Did you ever have to kill anyone?'
'Thankfully, I don’t think so no, though I did see combat….it’s not exactly something anyone wants to have to do typically…' I tried to make it clear I wasn’t exactly a fan of this type of question through tone of voice and body language. She didn’t appear to notice, because…
'Did anyone you knew die?'
Again, I adopted a more curt tone and tried to make it clear this wasn’t a great line of questioning for a first date. Usually that question gets asked but phrased differently like 'Did you lose anyone you knew' or simply 'did you see combat'.
I replied 'yes, several friends the second tour and one the first.'
Before I could even try to change the subject…
'How did they die???'
At this point I was pretty annoyed. We were sitting outside close to the parking lot and I sort of snapped 'Well, one of them got snipedstanding as close to me as we are to that car if that’s what you want to know.'
I kid you not, the next words out of her mouth, with no change in tone or anything, as casually as asking if I could pass the ketchup…
'Did he scream?'
Annnnnd that’s when I went off a bit. I let her know in no uncertain terms that her entire line of questioning wasn’t exactly ideal for a first date, and that she was lucky that despite my experiences I have my stuff together and a great deal of self-control - I know a few guys who would have likely snapped one way or another, either having a mental bout with depression and breaking down on the spot or going the opposite way to physical violence against the person who’d offended them with the questions. I let her know that asking anyone, military or not, if their friend screamed when they died was highly inappropriate under any circumstances.
Then I left and went back to work. Never heard from her again. No apology. No reaction whatsoever when I got angry with her. Just nothing.
I got over it, but that’s a date I doubt I’ll ever forget. And it’s not necessarily the facts of combat or anything - in the right company or circumstances I’ve actually got some funny stories from combat and Iraq/Korea in general, and don’t mind discussing the experiences. I don’t have any particular 'triggers' or hardcore Hollywood-style PTSD or anything. But this….just….no."
"It was her who walked out on me. A drop-dead gorgeous girl walked out on me.
And it was the best thing she could have done.
Some 3 years ago I set up a date with a girl who had been throwing glances at me and sending me greetings with a friend in common for quite some time now. I thought she was out my league so it took me some time to muster up courage to ask, but once I popped the question, she said yes with a smile from ear to ear.
The day came and we met up at the park and went for a walk, going through the usual chit-chat. I've never been one to sweet-talk girls but I always make a conscious effort to be attentive and chivalrous to everyone. Especially beautiful girls.
Anyways, back to the story, I noticed she was taking quite a few selfies whenever she saw something pretty around the park. Then we entered an interactive museum and the self-photography session just upscale. She'd be doing selfies at almost every hall, attraction, and corridor, and at some point she handed me her phone and asked me to actually snap the photos for her.
The walk around the museum turned into 1 hour of me chasing her around, photographing her beautiful self with about anything and everything she found worth doing a photo with. There were plenty of amazing weird science devices and other fun stuff, but rather than joining me in toying around with them, all she could use them for was to pose for pictures. That itself kind of killed my mood but I tried to be cool about it either way and just shrugged it off.
I brought up some interesting conversation topics but she didn't seem interested in the same things I was, and kept promptly running towards the next flashy device in sight to pose for the next picture, making it hard to keep a real conversation. The chit-chat became a dull exchange of the standard Q&A—in between snaps—, and when I’d crack some jokes, she didn't find them very funny.
Despite my best efforts, by that time into the date I guess my mood wasn’t at its best, which she most likely picked up on. The afternoon slowly slipped by, and even though I was still trying for it to work, it was clear neither of us was feeling it. Then she jokingly said something to remark just how good a catch she was—to this day I wonder in what way, exactly—, and later on—also 'jokingly'—let me know I wasn't very good at talking to a lady—which at that point was probably about right.
As we walked out of the museum, I proposed hitting a nearby coffee shop in the hopes it would eventually get better, but she came up with some lazy excuse and called it a day. Needless to say, there was no second date or any attempts to follow up from either side.
I won’t lie. I had high hopes pinned on that girl and at the moment I felt like a total loser. How could I ruin a date with a girl who practically had thrown herself into my arms? I kept going through my head trying to figure out what I could’ve done better. In the end I realized it wasn’t me who messed things up. And like I said, looking back I'm happy she had the guts to walk away from an awful date.
I don’t think we would have made it very far."
"I craved a good steak dinner so I invited an Internet person I had been chatting with to my favorite log cabin restaurant. I immediately thought it was strange that she asked me to come to her apartment to pick her up. Usually for Internet first dates, you don't usually give your address out. But I thought it wasn’t a big deal.
I drove up and a very large woman was standing there with a very large purse/satchel/bag, whatever. It was indeed her but I had to ask because she had posted an inaccurate photo of her online. She didn't look like the photo in face or body. 'Oh, okay.' I thought, 'We will have a nice dinner together and her untruthfulness wasn't going to ruin my dinner.' When we got to the restaurant I offered to lock her huge bag in the trunk, she said, 'No, I never go anywhere without THIS!' Now I am thinking what's with her attitude and that bag? I don't care for her much but no problem, we will have a pleasant dinner together anyway.
So, once seated I look over the drink list and there are a few domestic Cabernet and Merlots that I have had and liked, yeah, over priced but that's normal. She however wants the $75 dollar a bottle. I asked, 'Have you ever had that kind? Is it good?' 'No', she replied 'but that's what I want'. I said, 'Wow, it’s so expensive, how about If they sell it by the glass I get you one to see if you like it?' 'Oh, okay, we can go with one you already know you like', she agreed. I didn't think expensive drinks would come by the glass anyway.
The drinks come and for some reason the server pours a little for me to test and for my date also. We approve and the server takes our order for dinner. Now, this is a place that the smallest steak dinner is a full 16 ounces, It usually comes as two steaks with all the side dishes included. It's what I usually order and most of the time I bring one steak home. I'm a 200 lb man and I eat like a horse. This woman orders a 24 ounce porterhouse and floors me, but I say nothing. She obviously is out to get as much as she can for free and eat all week on the leftovers. I resolve never to see her again.
So, no worries, I'm annoyed, but I am going to still have a pleasant evening despite her quirks. So as she reaches over to drink, I notice her bracelet. 'Oh, what an attractive bracelet', I say. 'Yes, its magnetic!' she exclaims, 'and it helps me with wrist pain'. That's when the trouble started.
I say that I'm glad it helps her. It's my opinion that the help it gives people is Psychosomatic. She then virtually exploded with a very loud vulgar rant towards me. 'You are a freaking liar! My doctor knows that its real and you don't know a thing!' I see our waitress hiding behind a log, peeking out in horror. Everyone became silent in the whole place, the proverbial pin drop could have been heard in between this behemoth's shrieks.
Then I say, 'Just try to calm down, we have ordered our meals and can still have a nice dinner, then I will take you home and we never have to see each other again'. 'You're a liar!', she screamed again. 'And you had better pay for our food and not stiff the waitress!'
So I pushed away from the table, got up and leaned over the table towards her and said, 'Lady, don't you tell me how to act in a restaurant'. As I start to turn right towards where the server is hiding I see an angry patron on my right coming over to us, but he sees and hears me handling the situation and goes back to his table. The server was able to cancel our food, and she said she would get the almost full bottle and cork it for me. I go back and tell the date that if she wants a ride home to be out front in five minutes and I will drive up to the door. The server thanks me again. As she hands me the bottle she says, 'You will need this when you get home'. I let the woman get in my car. She placed that huge bag on her lap and puts her whole arm inside up to her elbow, pointing towards me. Now I realized what the bag is, it conceals her protection. I drive home with one eye on her, never saying a word. She never let her eyes leave me as we drove ten miles back to town. I resolve to crash the car on her side if she pulls a weapon on me, maybe bear spray, I don't know. I dropped her off at home and got the heck out of there.
That was the worst date of my life!"
"I met a guy online. I do not post pictures of myself which are older or hide what I look like — that behavior is illogical to me. The point I’m making is the guy in the following story knew what I looked like, top to bottom. I wasn’t just posting selfies of my face taken at a flattering angle.
I met this guy for dinner at a nicer restaurant of his choosing and I was so excited. We ordered drinks and dinner and he said, 'Have you ever thought of losing weight? I bet you could be real pretty if you were skinnier.'
I politely told him the date was over, got up, and found the waitress and explained to her what happened. I asked her to bring my meal and drink to the bar as well as the tab for my portion of the meal. I paid my tab and asked that my food be boxed up. I sat at the bar and drank my drink. Just as I got my to-go food arrived and I was preparing to leave, the guy comes up to me and tells me he needs a ride home. And he forgot his wallet. I tell him he’d better call a friend for a ride and to bring his wallet when they came. And I left him standing there with the bouncer to sort it out."
"It was a blind date set up by my BOSS of all people. From the moment I sat down and his first comment was about my great rack I knew I was in for a doozy. It went downhill from there fast. He was arrogant, against women, rude, and loud. Made blatant suggestive remarks to the server upon ordering drinks. Bragged about his salary and sports car. Made innuendo about getting me in bed later that the couple next to us could even hear. Just a complete prick of epic proportions. Within the first 10 minutes.
I suffered just long enough to give my order to our very sweet, harassed server, which just happened to be the most expensive thing on the menu. BY FAR. With a few sides. Which were à la carte. And a salad. Shoot, I think I would like another glass of pinot! And what the heck, let’s just throw in a delicious glass of MacAllen 18 at $45 a pop -for each of us - so we can toast! Romeo here is rich! I think I even know what we should have for dessert!
As he (finally) shut up and sat there speechless, I waited about 5 minutes and smiled as I excused myself to the ladies room, where I walked right past the entrance and without a second glance headed straight for the back door. I b-lined for my car, peeled out, and was home enjoying a glass of pinot with a bowl of cheese popcorn balanced on my knees happily soaking in a bubble bath 15 minutes later. Which is about the time I received a phone call from Don Juan. Unfortunately, I can’t tell you what Casanova had to say that night, as I deleted the voicemail without listening - but I’m betting he had at least two choice words for me.
However, I did stop by that restaurant on my way home from work next day to make sure our server received a gracious tip, as I figured Harvey Weinstein had probably not compensated her properly for the verbal harassment. She was very appreciative, and thanked me with a surprising recap of the rest of the evening. It seems my potential suitor was rather unamused with my disappearing act, and was so disgruntled that when presented with the bill he stood up, screamed in outrage, and proceeded to throw what can only be described as a full-blown Mel Gibson hate-spewing temper tantrum - complete with red-face, clenched fists, and an impetuous kick to the chair he’d been sitting in, breaking it into several pieces and unfortunately scaring the heck out of both the staff and guests. Lucky for him the restaurant’s Manager was the nicest guy on the planet, and when given the option between the police being called or paying for the damage, he forked over an additional $100 for the chair.
As I handed our server a gracious tip on my way out, I smiled to myself. Some may say that diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but I can assure you karma is priceless. Or at least worth $417 (including the chair).
Oh- and my boss never mentioned a word."