We have all had that one vacation where something unexpected happens, but normally that makes the trip so much more memorable. These stories on the other hand do the opposite and are vacations you don't want to remember.
“In hindsight, it was an incredibly dumb move to try to fly…”
“I was traveling for work – had not been feeling well for several days. I had a sneaking suspicion that I might have appendicitis. Decided to try to fly home and would go to the ER as soon as I landed. Get on the plane, taxi to the runway, and sat in a ground-hold for the better part of 2 hours. At this point I felt really, really bad. I was close to ringing the flight attendant call button and explaining that I needed to get off the plane. We were finally cleared for take-off, and fortunately it was a relatively short flight. I landed and drove straight to the ER. Three hours later I was in surgery to have my appendix removed. In hindsight, it was an incredibly dumb move to try to fly. If my appendix had ruptured mid-flight, well….”
“Forrest Gump on a loop for 24 hours…”
“Was in Germany a few years back when that Volcano in Iceland erupted, and European countries closed their airports. I had to go through Poland and Baltic countries with polish bus drivers who couldn’t speak english, while watching polish dubbed Forrest Gump on a loop for 24 hours.”
“In trying to escape we got hit with tear gas…”
“Got stuck in a soccer riot in Greece. We were in Thessaloniki and just walking about when out of nowhere we see a police motorcade full of motorcycles and horses. We thought it must be some sort of festival or parade or something because a crowd was drawing. Eventually we heard singing coming down the block and hundreds of hooligans were marching toward the police. Once we realized what was going on we tried to leave but sh*t already started to go down. In trying to escape we got hit with tear gas from the police and found shelter in a random apt building. That one, while terrifying in the moment is one of my favorite memories looking back.”
“I hate disney world…”
“Ah, when I was young, my parents were in the process of splitting up when my dad proposed a trip to disney world with us, his kids. That seemed cool. Then, the morning of, he picked us up with this woman we had never seen before and her infant child. Turns out that was our new half brother and my dad’s mistress. We were then trapped in the car with this woman we hated and forced to go to disney world with her. We would fight over who had to sit next to her on rides and get yelled at. We would squirm away from her in pictures, etc. We were dragged to disney world many times after that with this “new family.” Every trip was horrible. I hate disney world. I cannot think of any place in the entire world I would dislike vacationing to more than Disney World.”
“Most of the amenities were shut down…”
“I took a transatlantic cruise back from the Mediterranean to the US on board a Holland America ship, because we thought it might be more fun that just flying back. As we were boarding we were given notice that there was some kind of severe sickness on the previous cruise with lots of vomiting, basically the whole ship had become a vomitorium. Elevators, hallways, walls, everywhere. Most of the amenities were shut down, including laundry facilities. There were notices that also said the ship was being “deep cleaned” to remove the virus or germs, or whatever the issue was, but I didn’t really see many signs of that, as our room was pretty filthy. There was a layer of grime on the phone that made it look like it was never washed, the sheets looked dirty and stained, and that bathroom was mildew city. We immediately made demands to have the room cleaned again, and it wasn’t much better. After a two days on the ship, we started to hear about people getting sick on the cruise, and being quarantined in their quarters. I even saw fresh vomit in the hall. We were still traveling around the coast of Europe, and were at a port in Spain when we decided to nope the f**k out of the rest of the cruise, took the loss, and fly back home instead anyway.”
“Don’t eat a turkey and mayo sandwich in Atlanta…”
“In June of 2013 I went on a plane by myself for the first time (I was 16) to France. I had to go from Memphis to Atlanta then Brussels, Belgium to Nantes, France. When I got to Atlanta I had a four hour layover. I got a little bit hungry so I bought myself a turkey sandwich. Fast forward to the plane. I’m sitting between a elderly german couple who are snoring. I hear my stomach make a noise like a bear having a stroke. I say oh sh*t and try to stumble over the old dude but I trip and fall on my face. I pick myself up wait five minutes for one of the stalls to be open, then proceed to puke for the rest of the flight. I get to brussels and like on the plane my stomach is still heaving. Soon I find a restroom and the guys one is out of order. I pretty much say screw it and go to the ladies restroom. People look at me like I am out of my mind and go to a stall, puke, nod to the two pretty young women in there, and leave. A pretty nice guy gets me through a shorter line then where I was supposed to go and the next thing I know is I am on my flight. The guy who was supposed to sit with me saw me fill a few bags and was pretty much upgraded to first class. All this time the stewardesses are giving me more bags. I say thank you, leave, pick up my luggage, and go to some family members house. I am then in bed for two days from food poisoning and dehydration. Don’t eat a turkey and mayo sandwich in Atlanta.”
“That time I went abroad and didn’t end up in hospital…”
“Went to Rome and ended up in hospital with a liver infection and no English speaking doctors. Went to Cambodia and got mugged by a group of guys on mopeds and my local friends decided to chase them with meat cleavers and machetes I didn’t previously know they owned. Went to Australia and got third degree burns on my foot on the last day of a festival I was volunteering at and got lots of morphine and my Brazilian friends found a trolley to wheel me back to my hostel in after. Pick your favorite. My most recent travel album on Facebook was titled ‘That time I went abroad and didn’t end up in hospital!'”
“Everyone had HOOK WORMS in their feet and legs…”
“The trip was great for me, and everyone else involved until the end. Went to Jamaica with a 40+ person wedding party. When we got back to the states people started texting in circles that everyone had HOOK WORMS in their feet and legs. Only about 5 people didn’t get them and I was one of the lucky few. Some people had the hook worms travel all the way to their knees.”
“All the dogs came running and had a great time eating…”
“A caravan trip to the north of Western Australia in the 70s. On the way we were headed through a cattle grid (for those that don’t know this is where the fence crosses the road and there is a metal grid in the road to stop cows). There was a dead bloated cow on the grid and a car coming the other way so my father had to drive over the cow. Which burst. We wound up the windows very fast and at the next town all the dogs came running and had a great time eating chunks of dead cooked rotten cow off the car. We then drove over 180 miles of corrugated unsealed road and spent the night in a caravan park – read bare dirt patch with no power and thunderbox loos for caravan park. We had a fire in the caravan that night. When we got to our destination and hooked up the power there was an electrical fault which threw my mother 30ft. It was supposed to be a ‘save the marriage’ holiday. I was about 15 and the entire month was hell on wheels.”
“So much had changed in 4 years…”
“After 4 years in England, I flew back to the US into Charleston airport. My friend was a no-show, so I rented a car and started driving home. So much had changed in 4 years that I had to stop at a gas station and ask for directions. The person was having a hard time, so I said: ‘What road takes me East. I can find my way from there.’ And she said: ‘Honey, if you go East, you’ll go into the ocean.’ I was in Charleston SOUTH CAROLINA and was supposed to be in WEST VIRGINIA.”
“Eventually water was seen coming in the vents and…”
“Taking the small fast boat that operated between Portsmouth and France. It was a stormy day but the boat had been given the all clear to go. After a while at sea the weather got a lot worse and the boat started becoming pretty unsteady. People began being sea sick and then the staff also started hurling all over the place. Eventually water was seen coming in the vents and smoke. Turns out the smoke was from a flair that had gone off by accident, however I did not think I would live to see another day. We were the last boat to make that trip that day as the company cancelled all the other crossings.”
“Finally when we got to the resort…”
“It was our honeymoon and we got to the gate and as we’re about to enter the plane we’re told to step aside because our tickets are void and have not been paid. We frantically tried to call/email our travel agent to figure out what the he** happened since we have confirmation numbers and receipts. As we watch the clock getting closer and closer to departure time, the desk agent tells us pay up for new seats or miss our flight and by extension our all-expenses paid vacation. We pay up and run back to the gate just in time. When we arrived at our destination, our driver was nowhere to be found. We spent 1.5 hrs calling the hotel, the travel agent, and the car company. Eventually an airport worker found the driver napping in his car. Finally when we got to the resort, we spent half of the time sick from the change of food. Needless to say, this was one of the worst and most expensive vacations we’ve ever.”
“The surgeon said it was the biggest she had ever seen…”
“My wife and I went to the Bahamas and 6 hours after we got there I started having stomach pains. Two hours later we are at a local hospital where they did a CT scan which they said was fine. My wife happens to be an Oncologist and saw my CT and noticed that my gallbladder was the size of my liver and immediately said we are not staying here. We paid for a medevac to the tune of $22k and I was in surgery back home in 12 hours. My gallbladder was 13cm (normal is 7-8) with a 3.8cm stone in the middle of it. The surgeon said it was the biggest she had ever seen. I also got to ride in a Learjet, so I guess that’s something. I have one vacation photo of me on the tarmac standing next to the plane looking like sh*t. I plan on blowing it up and framing it.”
“His parents continued on to the Bahamas…”
“I work at a military school. This experience happened to one of my students: One August, his parents told him to pack enough clothes for a two-week vacation in the Bahamas. They would be flying out the next day. Instead, they flew with him to military boarding school, where he was enrolled, in-processed, and had his head shaved. He stayed through the school year. Insult to injury: His parents continued on to the Bahamas without him.”
“We were having a great time until I heard a shriek…”
“I was hiking in the rainforest on the Brazilian/Argentinian border near Iguazu Falls with one of my best friends. It was a stunning landscape and we were having a great time until I heard a shriek come from behind me. My friend had wanted to take a picture of something slightly off the path, and walked directly into a spiderweb. This wasn’t just any spiderweb, it was about 6 feet tall and spanned between two large trees across a 4 foot distance. Her entire body was coated in web. We all laughed at her and cleaned her off…and luckily never saw the spider that went with it.”
“When we crossed the border they pointed assault rifles…”
“When I was 9 my family took a road trip to Northern Ireland. When we crossed the border they pointed assault rifles at our minivan, and when we got to town the people were parading around a dead guy who had died protesting the government through hunger strike. We left the same day.”
“The first vivid hallucination I remember was…”
“I was going to China to visit my father who works overseas and at the time I was big into drugs and had a 15 hour red-eye flight. now his company paid for business class seats, so I had a comfortable ride ahead of me. Not having to worry about being elbow to elbow with someone for 15 hours, I decided to have some fun. Packed my laptop, loaded up with movies and music, and dropped three tabs of Hoffman Bicycle acid. As the flight took off, the acid started to kick in. Slowly at first, but from the increasing waves of hallucinations I was getting, it was picking up rapidly. The first vivid hallucination I remember was the seat back in front of me reaching out and engulfing me. I don’t know if I actually physically placed my face up against the weathered cotton, but I must have, because the fibers felt so real on my forehead it was like I was swimming in an ocean of textiles. By the time the flight landed in Toronto, I was tripping face. And as I tried to decipher my boarding pass, I realized I had 20 minutes to connect with the flight to Beijing. In a panicked rush I sprint off the plane, only to find myself in an arrivals terminal I didn’t know the layout of. Shoulda figured this out before being high, in hindsight, but it is what it is. Turns out the gate for my departure is on the complete opposite end of the airport. So here I am, flat-out sprinting, carryon luggage bouncing behind me. I think I might have clipped a toddler on the way past. It’s possible. I don’t remember. I finally arrive at the gate, show my boarding pass, and get ushered onto the flight. As the flight attendant opened her mouth, she spoke simple words. “Globe and Mail, or National Post, sir?”. I tried to process what she was saying but couldn’t. Her stern face slowly elongated towards me, accordion-like, until it sat mere centimeters from my own. The hair on her cheek mole tickled me. It seemed as though my entire field of vision was occupied by a giant, larger-than-life face. Her demonic maw opened again and more horrifying sounds came out, but what she said was “Sir? Post or Globe?”. I was terrified. I stammered out “..p-n–at-post”, which she handed me. I didn’t read it. Takeoff was the most frightening thing ever. In fact I vividly hallucinated a ball of flame engulfing the 777 as it disintegrated on the runway, but actually, the feeling of 220,000 pounds of thrust is f**king amazing when you’re on the moon. Airplanes are f**king weird man. Don’t do acid on them.”
“Worst Christmas ever…”
“My dad woke my brother and me up in the middle of the night while visiting grandma and grandpa to make us WALK to the airport. My dad is a very unstable person, and he can lose his sh*t at the drop of the hat. I was 11, visiting my grandparents in Florida with my dad. He went out, got piss drunk, lost his cell phone, and decided that we were leaving. He woke us up in the middle of the night to pack our bags. Cut to the three of us walking down the street with our bags while my grandparents coast next to us begging us to get in the car. We walked for a little while, then caught a cab. Once we got to the airport, I guess my dad realized he couldn’t possibly pay for 3 more tickets home, so he lost it (again), threw his suitcase across the terminal, and left. Just walked out of the airport. I can still see him disappearing at the top of a hill. My brother and I got our bags, found a maintenance guy (who saw everything but didn’t give a sh*t), and asked where the pay phone was. I guess we were going to look up my grandparents’ number or something. But then they showed up and took us home. In the morning, dad was there, acting like nothing ever happened. Worst Christmas ever.”
“The captain tells us that we have to evacuate the plane…”
“I’m finally boarding my flight home which has a stop in N.C. to pick up other passengers. I’m told we don’t have to get off the flight, some people will get off, others will get on and we are off again. However…when we land there just so happens to be a fire alarm going off inside the airport. The captain tells us that we have to evacuate the plane. Everyone gets off and is sitting around inside the airport and for about 30 minutes everyone is told to leave the building but no one wants to. Finally about half the people start to leave so I decide to get up and go with them. I am wearing a t-shirt and shorts and its about 30 degrees outside now that I am no longer in florida, but all my warm clothes are in my checked bag. 30 minutes later they let us enter the airport again but say we have to go through security again since we exited the building. We wait for 2 hours and someone finally comes over and tells us that they sent the people who refused to evacuate, along with all our luggage on to rhode island because we could not get on the plane without going through security but TSA had all gone home during the fire alarm because there were no flights left. So here I am stuck in North Carolina with just the clothes on my back. I buy a phone charger in the airport and am told the only available food is a vending machine across the street that closes in 10 minutes. I go get my M&m and Dorito dinner, come back and try to figure out whats going on. I am told that they will put us on the next flight out at no charge (such gentlemen)…the next flight is not until 10:30 pm the next day. I ask if there is any way they can put me on a flight back to Florida and they say no, so I ask if they will put me on a flight with a different airline and I will pay the difference in the ticket, they say no. I try to rent a car but it is closed for the night, and the only bus station is 2 hours away. So I give up and spend the entire night and all the next day in the airport.”