This one might really take the cake on the worst, most poorly planned, disaster of a wedding.
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It all started when Betty was invited to her future sister-in-law’s wedding in a small town in the mountains of Colorado, a nine-hour drive from her home in Kansas City. It would turn out to be the worst wedding Betty has ever attended and frankly, after reading the story, it’s up there as one of the worst weddings of all time.
The trouble started well before the wedding when Betty called her sister-in-law to ask about hotel information for the destination wedding. Bea, whose brother was Betty’s fiancée, Alex, told her future sister-in-law that the three hotels listed on the wedding website were all “in the general area of the town.” No other info was forthcoming. Betty had no idea where the wedding was going to be or which hotel was closest. Bea simply told her the wedding was in a state park nearby but nothing else, leaving Betty to guess. So she booked a place, but if only she knew then that this would be the first, of many, major red flags.
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Fast-forward to the day before the wedding, a Friday. Betty and Alex left early for the long drive and they still didn’t have a clue as to what was going to happen. When they arrived in town, they discovered that cell service was spotty at best. Getting in touch with the bride seemed like a nonstarter, so Betty tried for a bridesmaid she befriended throughout the poorly planned bachelorette and shower parties, Ellie.
“Ellie says she can’t get Bea to commit to anything but that there seems to be a party arranged at the condo they have rented.” Betty recalls, “It’s about a 10-minute drive from us, no big deal. We are told BYOB and anything we want to eat. So we stop at the store for dinner and some beverages and head over.”
Up to this point, despite many attempts to pin down details about the wedding, Bea had basically blown off Betty and Alex. Now, the day before the wedding, when Betty and Alex met up with the bride and groom and the rest of the family and friends, Bea laid into Betty for doing everything wrong.
“We arrive at the condo and are immediately chastised by Bea for not booking a neighboring condo as the rest of the wedding party is staying there.” Betty explained, “I diplomatically apologize and say I didn’t know. The groom, Tom, some of his friends, and his mom (the only family member of his to make the trip) are there, of course, as well as her friends and the wedding party.”
On the morning of the big day, the couple went out to enjoy some breakfast when Alex miraculously got a phone call. It was Bea, and she was furious. ‘Where are you? We’re leaving for pictures in half an hour!'”
It seems that Bea’s plan was to turn into a bridezilla on the day of the wedding and reprimand Betty for not reading her mind.
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The couple raced back to the hotel and Alex changed into his suit. Betty was not required to be in the pictures, so she hung back, telling Alex she would see him at the ceremony. Of course, things won’t work out like that. Just minutes after Alex left, Betty received a call from him, “We might need you to drive us around for the pictures, is that okay?”
Of course, Betty was happy to help out. Sadly, it meant she wouldn’t get any lunch, as now she needed to get dressed. Alex told her he’ll call her back with the details, which, if they were coming from Bea, was definitely not a good sign. She heard nothing from Alex or Bea. No details, no schedule, and now, no communication at all. Finally, she decided she better just head to the ceremony, as it’s getting close to the ceremony and she still wasn’t sure where it was. So, Betty headed out towards the state park hoping she’d find it when she got there. When she arrived though, the craziness got amped up quite a few notches.
Showtime arrived and still, the bride’s parents are nowhere to be found. Betty questioned where they have been all day, assuming they would be there for pictures, but, Alex has no answers. The officiant urges the ceremony to continue. Bea is finally starting to freak out. With just seconds to spare, Alex and Bea’s parents finally arrived and the ceremony actually goes off without a hitch, shocking as that may seem.
The reception, however, does not.
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Right after the ceremony, Bea addressed the crowd, “We’re going to have a reception at XYZ Bar. They have a room for us. Just follow the main road of the town. You can’t miss it. We’re going to get some more pictures and then we’ll be there.”
What could possibly go wrong with those detailed instructions? Luckily, Betty knew where the bar was, as she had seen it earlier while out on the town. When they arrived, the private room had a bar, but no adult beverages and no bartender. There was simply one pitcher of water and a sad-looking wedding cake in the corner.
Betty spotted a staff member in the catering kitchen behind the bar and asked about getting a drink. “There’s no service up here,” he says. “You’ll have to go downstairs.”
Not only is there not an open bar, but there’s also not even a cash bar IN THE SAME ROOM AS THE RECEPTION. Super. Guests trickle in. There is no music. Everyone hungrily eyes the cake.
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The bride and groom rolled in around 6:30 PM. Bea shouted, “Who wants to buy us a drink?!”
Betty cringed, “I have never been so close to slapping a bride.”
Someone went downstairs and got them drinks. Another diplomatically asks about food. To no one’s surprise, Bea says, “we have cake.”
The guests had to order food if they wanted anything else. Turns out, the bar doesn’t even serve food, but they allowed guests to order delivery from other places and receive it there for a small fee. Slapping a bride in this situation might not even be bad manners. For those keeping score, there are no drinks and no food beyond the sad cake in the corner. This is what happens when a flake plans a wedding.
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With no food at the party except for the cake and no drinks at the bar, Alex begs Bea to cut the cake just so the guests can have something to eat. She agreed. The guests scarf down the cake as if it was their last meal and then the funniest, and saddest, thing happened…one of the guests turned on some music…from his phone. That’s right, the music was provided through the two tiny speakers on a cell phone.
Betty has had enough. Having not eaten since breakfast, she was starving and angry and annoyed at how the day had gone.
“At 8 PM I decide that I’m going to do someone serious harm if I don’t eat.”
She and Alex and some other starving guests ditched the party to find a place that served food. Yet not long after they left, she received a text from Ellie, the bridesmaid, telling her that Bea was MAD and didn’t understand why everyone had left. Like, what? There was no food, no beverages, no music, no dancing, what did this insane bride think was going to happen?
Still, Betty agreed to meet up at another bar with the whole wedding party. The newlyweds arrived there and yes, you guessed it, the first words out of Bea’s mouth when they arrived were: “Who wants to buy us a drink!?”
Finally, the horrible, ill-planned wedding came to a close. Betty and Alex packed up and make the 9-hour trek back home the next day.And this may come as a shock, but Betty reported that the happy couple with the crazy bride were divorced two months later. Apparently, not putting any effort into your wedding translated into not putting any effort into the marriage. Who would have thought?!
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