You all have that friend that doesn't know when to say when on social media. They do a whole lot to make everyone uncomfortable, right? Well check out these over-sharers.
No One Wants To See Pictures Of Your Kid’s Bathroom Successes
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“People posting ‘proof’ that their toddler used the potty. I don’t want to see your child’s poop, thanks.”
Watching A Downward Decent Into Mental Illness
“A close childhood friend’s full descent into schizophrenic madness, documented daily with as much as 20 Facebook status updates over the course of the past six years. At first, it was just him finding religion, then it went full crazy, then it got hateful (gays, cancer patients, basically everyone deserves death), then he started seeing and hearing things and now he thinks he’s a prophet, literally a modern Noah. He has left the sinful world behind and is preparing a cult compound (his ark!) for the end of days on a farm his wealthy, enabling father bought him. Facebook is his means of preaching to the outside world.
He believes America is Sodom and when the end comes, the few remaining righteous will be saved on his farm and he will be a king. He also believes the Lord has promised him a wife and that she is coming to the farm any day now….funny how the date of arrival keeps getting pushed back! He even posts pictures of her. Very creepy. I reverse image searched them on google and she’s just some random girl from California who probably has no idea who he is.
It’s fascinating, like witnessing a train wreck. You just can’t look away.”
Propositioning Over Facebook Can Be Awkward
“Guy I went to school with posted a status, most likely while drunk based on the 1am timestamp, asking if any guy on his friends list was interested in having sex with his wife while he watched.
One of her family members called him out on that not being something to post on Facebook and he got into an argument with them.”
A Daughter Ruins A Lawsuit Settlement With Her Oversharing
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“1.) Father files suit against employer (a school) for age discrimination and wins $80,000 settlement. Terms of settlement included not disclosing terms of settlement to anyone except for involved attorneys and advisers.
2.) Daughter posts about it on Facebook to 1200 followers, including current and former students on said school.
3.) Court rules confidentiality was breached. Motion to enforce $80,000 settlement reversed.
4.)School doesn’t have to pay.”
Husband Posts All The Wrong Photos
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“After recovering from a horrific labor, I asked my husband to load 2 pictures off of my camera on FB. He did that, plus the whole rest of the ROLL. My abused, swollen body was on Facebook for over 24 hours before my BROTHER alerted me. No one else told me! I’m still angry, and this was 3 years ago! He doesn’t touch the camera! EVER!”
Some People Just Don’t Know When To Stop
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“Ahh this trainwreck girl I went to high school with.
My brother and I have coworkers who add her just for the pure entertainment value. She’s tamed down because she recently had a baby (much to society’s dismay). But, among other things she’s live updated her Facebook feed on: cheating on her husband, justifying her decision to do so because the guy works at subway and was going to be the manager soon, so he’s better than her husband anyway, her cat’s labor, the subsequent rekindling of her marriage, her blowout fight with her SIL and brother over them apparently not allowing her to see her niece, her brain tumor, her multiple ear infections, how drunk she is(x1000)”
Surprise! You’re Pregnant!
“This girl from my high school a year younger than me posted statuses for about 5 months complaining about how people would ask her when she was expecting/due to give birth at her job (hairdresser) and how angry she was and that she was ‘just fat.’ Fast forward one month, ‘so I just found out I am 8 months pregnant!’
HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW FOR 8 MONTHS?!”
Sometimes Social Media Hears The Cry For Help
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“A friend from high school began posting things to his closest friends’ FB walls. Things like ‘You’ve been a great friend and it meant the world to me.’ He did this for at least 5 friends that I could see. The messages kept getting darker and darker, but it was the middle of the work day so no one seemed to see them (no comments or anything). I barely knew the guy, but I knew something wasn’t right.
I called one of his closest friends and told her to look at her FB ‘RIGHT NOW.’ I told her about the other messages. Luckily she was able to get online at the time. She said she’d call him and talk to him. Apparently, he didn’t answer his phone, so she drove to his house. She banged on the door, but he didn’t answer. She broke in and found him on his bed, passed out from an overdose.
She called 911 and saved his life.
Of course, I didn’t find out about any of this until the next day when she called me. I’m so very glad that I noticed all his messages and reached out to his friend. He was in the hospital for a while and received some deep therapy. Eventually, he messaged me to say ‘thank you.'”
The Constant Selfie Taker Is Too Much To Take
“Okay, so I have a cousin who irritates the shit out of me on Facebook because she will post a status about literally, actually, seriously, every single menial stupid task she does through the day, with a picture of her smiling face attached to it. Like ‘Going to McDonald’s!’ and then a picture of just her face, her whole face in the frame and absolutely nothing else. I feel like no one but me thinks this is weird. Because the rest of my dumb family will comment stuff like ‘That sounds nice!’ and ‘You’re so pretty!’ and ‘get me some too I’ll take a 10pc chicken nugget LOL’ and I’m like ….does no one else care that the picture is of her face? Most people take a picture of the McDonald’s bag. That’s also annoying, but it’s normal–the kind of harmlessly annoying shit that a lot of people do. But my cousin takes a goddamn selfie and MAKES THE SAME FACE EVERY TIME. Sometimes I’m so blown away by how much of an evil idiot genius savant she is that I have to stop scrolling and take a moment to let it sink in, because what she’s doing is wrong, but in a subtle way, like it’s just a little off. Like, I don’t know why it upsets me but it does.
Anyway, the point is that she needs to stop over-sharing her every move with attached pictures of her face.”
Everything Was Posted Online, Even After The DNA Test Proved Her “Hubby” Was Lying
“This girl I went to high school with met and married this guy who was like 25 years her senior. He was from out of state and they married not long after meeting. I thought it was really weird, but whatever.
Not even 2 months into the marriage, she starts posting rants about how her new husband’s ex won’t stop ‘stalking’ him. Apparently, this woman had a baby and she was claiming it was his. Not only that, she was claiming that she was also his fiancé and he had run out on her. My former classmate would post day in and day out about how she was just some ‘homewrecker’ who wanted to ruin what they had because she was jealous.
Well one day, hubby gets served papers at work. He’s being sued by this woman for child support. I know this because my classmate posted every juicy detail about it on Facebook. Her hubby vehemently denies all of it. He claims he’s never even met this woman, that she’s a crazy stalker, that her kid isn’t his, etc.
Court day rolls around and my classmate is updating her status like crazy. Hubby is requesting a DNA test. The suspense is left to build for a few more days.
You’ll never guess what happened, guys! The results came back and he totally was the father. Not only that, he was also the other woman’s fiancee. Oh snap! Now the entire story spills out. Turns out this guy skipped town once he found out his fiancé was pregnant (for whatever reason). He met and married my classmate and took her name, thinking that would somehow throw his ex off the trail so she couldn’t sue him for child support.
For a couple weeks, my classmate would post statuses about ‘standing by her man no matter what,’ but ultimately they were divorced by the end of the year.”
Guy Gets More Than He Bargained For When He Met A Couple At Their Wedding
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“One of the best weddings I have ever been to was for a couple I didn’t know. I was just there as +1. Seriously fun wedding, and the bride and groom seemed like cool people, so I added them on Facebook.
About 6-7 months later the vague-booking began, then the divorce announcement and then things went crazy. The guy posted an incredible amount of updates about his feelings, the divorce and how she cheated. The woman, understandably, locked down her privacy settings around this time, but he kept the show going. Within 2 months of the divorce, he had met someone new, documented every date, proposed, moved in together, got married again and quit his job.
It’s been an interesting little soap opera in my newsfeed.”
Family Drama Plays Out In Public Forum
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“A girl I work with’s ex husband died. She found out and posted it on Facebook immediately, literally moments after it happened. She wrote down plain and clear that he died of an overdose before it was even established that he had. Apparently, a bunch of his family saw it, including his mother, and found out about his death this way. They texted her in anger about it the next day telling her it was disrespectful and they got into this giant text battle where they asked her to bring over his children to mourn with their family and she replied with personal things about how people were abused in his family as kids and that the family would never see them again. I know all this because she posted screenshots on Facebook of the conversation as it was happening. His family started replying things like ‘what’s wrong with you’ and ‘why are you doing this to us’ but she just wrote back things like ‘shut up you alcoholic.’ This went on for days.
Not gonna lie, I got some popcorn and watched the show. These people are all working professionals, I’m talking teachers and nurses. How she didn’t lose her job is beyond me.”
An Ex Loses Her Mind Online
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“A year ago, my ex added me on Facebook. I figured it was really nothing because we’d not spoken to teach other since freshman year of High School (5 years before). I added her, we spoke a bit, it was pretty okay. We were on pretty decent ground with one another. I thought.
A few months go by and she begins posting these vague statuses up. You know the kind, going on about ‘certain people’, posting song lyrics and what she thinks are good poems. I figure whatever, she’s probably going through a hard time, and I’ve been there before. I ignore it.
Then they begin getting a little more specific. So much so that I can tell she is talking about an ex. Someone who doesn’t care about her anymore, and constantly shows off to ‘try and make her jealous’. Gee, that sucks.
Then nonsense hits the fan. I post the fact that, without going into too much detail here, I got work doing something that I’ve always wanted to, and that it’s a pretty big step for me. I thanked my friend who got me the job, we planned a trip out to celebrate in the comments and things were okay at first.
I still remember her status about an hour after that. It was a little bit on the nose, but enough for me to catch on to who she is talking about. ‘I hope that job does to you what you did to me.’
Well okay. I see that, piece things together, then immediately delete and block her. I don’t have time for that nonsense. My friend then contacts me, asking if I see what she’s posting.
She, at this point, is straight up saying my name in her stats. She’s posting my picture, talking about how I am a selfish prick who ‘dumped her in the trash.’ She’s expanding on the lies and just completely jumping the shark. I realize at this point that I have a crazy ex.”
Live Tweeting Your Labor Is Way Too Much
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“A girl I went to high school with live-tweeted during her entire labor. Updated every ten minutes about how dilated she was, how badly she felt like she had to push, how terrified she was that she was going to poop on the table, lol oops she DID poop on the table…”
Small Town Information Spreads
“A guy that I went to High School with professes his love of Strip Clubs, how they’re better than a real relationship, his preference of clubs, and ‘lame’ laws that pertain to strip clubs wherever he goes.
Another guy I went to High School with recently started a GoFundMe to pay his rent.”
Wow, Things Get CRAZY When An Online Relationship Gets Real
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“She and her husband married at 18 and 19 years old. She is from Canada, he is from the Bahamas. They met online through a mutual friend. They ‘dated’ online for about 6 years before the marriage, but only really saw each other a couple of times before tying the knot. The whole time they dated, she posted over and over on the hour how in love she was, meanwhile he was never online.
After they graduated and married, she moved in with him in the Bahamas and deleted every person from Canada on her Facebook. They were together for a year and she started vaguebooking. No more lovey statuses about how happy they were. Then in August, she re-added her Canadian pals. Her timeline was nothing but vague, depressing posts and memes about being faithful, being a good wife/husband, true love, a strong marriage, babies, heaven, and god.
So then it got real. She came back to Canada at the end of August. Every single day was a long post about hating her husband, calling him a filthy, lying piece of trash, saying she isn’t divorced but she is separated. Every day was like the page of an angry teens diary, because that’s pretty much what it was. She only just turned 21 when this all happened. So then she starts posting about her miscarriage. I knew she was baby crazy, but she got unreal with it. Multiple statuses a week talking to her dead fetus, calling it by name, and the same number of statuses written speaking to her dead Aunt telling her to take good care of her baby. Then she posted a multi-paragraph essay about what happened between her and her husband. What I gathered was: She has undiagnosed mental health issues, she saw a counselor who advised she see a doctor about medication, she has many physical health problems that doctors don’t help her with, she says she shouldn’t have gotten married, he hit her dog. Now she was a drama queen since she was very young, so I wasn’t sure he actually hit her dog, or if her issues were coming between them and she wanted out or both.
So now, phase 3: things get insane. She is still in Canada. Facebook is filled with ‘heartfelt apologies’ and the rantings of a madwoman going on about life and God and her deceased fetus and her mistakes and his mistakes and she starts going more baby crazy. Eventually, she realizes that she will never have her baby without a partner. Instead of finding someone more suiting and actually divorcing him, she gets back with him. You read it right. After ruining his reputation more than it already was by being with her, she ‘took him back.’ In December, they were officially back together and he came to Canada for Christmas. In fact, he came back again and they are here together now. She lives with her parents, and honestly I pity what her parents must hear.”
Holding Nothing In On Social Media While Holding Everything In
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“Someone commented on every rest stop they made on a 3 day road trip and described in way too much detail about their IBS issues. In between her reviews were updates on having to hold it (a countdown of miles to the next rest stop every 5-10 minutes for a while and what she expected to happen), what restaurants she’s never going to again, and requests for med suggestions other than Immodium or Pepto. I don’t want to know that about my family, let alone someone I know from work. I realized I’m better off just talking to friends and family rather than know such intimate details of everyone I’ve ever met and I deleted my account before her trip was over.”
Every Detail, Good and Bad, Is Enough To Drive Followers Insane
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“Not so much over-sharing, but a hilarious train wreck. My sister’s friend notoriously posts vague status, or rants about how much she hates work, or her boyfriend or how she has no real friends. She’ll then post selfies saying she loves her job, her boyfriend, or whatever ‘bestie’ she has that month.
She is a serial dater, and plans to be engaged after the first date with every guy she meets. And posts that on Facebook.
Her current boyfriend (who she has broken up with seven times or so, and who also lied about being married with children) and lost it on her for putting their entire relationship on Facebook, fights and all and asked her to stop. A very reasonable request, even though he tends to over-share his love for her too.
Her solution? Make a second account so she can still complain about him, his wife, and his family publicly.”
The Classic Aunt Over-Sharer
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“My aunt recently went through a pretty messy divorce.
Many, many status updates and shared photos said things to the effect of:
‘I am more than the man who wasted half of my life’
‘My husband is a jerk, its no wonder I drink’
‘Being a biological dad doesn’t make you a father’
She is now dating someone else and posts statuses and photos of his grandchildren as if they’re the ones who’ve been married for 30+ years. It’s weird.”