Family dynamics can take a beating when beliefs and politics are involved. One father took to social media for advice after he was diagnosed with cancer. He wonders if he should tell his daughter the news despite her cutting ties.
The 55-year-old father shared the sensitive situation on Reddit. He explains that he is married, and the couple’s 35-year-old daughter has removed them from her life. The father explains that he and his wife have differing political opinions “but make things work.” He says he respects his daughter’s passion for her beliefs but has not heard anything even though multiple important dates have passed.
The poster reveals that doctors recently gave him a cancer diagnosis and is working through the process and treatments with his wife. He has surgery booked for next month, and the couple has started sharing the news with loved ones. He explains, “It is possible that our daughter will find out one way or another.”
The Father Does Not Want To Force His Child Into Reaching Out
The man shares that his own parents didn’t disclose their health problems, and he regrets not spending enough time with them before they passed. That said, he doesn’t want to reach out to his daughter as it may look like he is using his illness as a way to bring her back into his life. He also says she has had ample opportunity to reach out if she wanted anything to do with them. He asks if he’s in the wrong for feeling he has no obligation to contact his daughter, considering the circumstances.
Many commenters appreciate the situation’s sensitivity, and one even proposed an idea the poster claims they will try. One reply, with over 5000 likes, says, “You don’t owe her your diagnosis but informing her isn’t selfish, it’s thoughtful.” Another suggests no contact might be the best way forward, writing, “She said she doesn’t want contact, respect that. If she wanted updates on health problems/big things, she probably would have said that.”
One user suggests the father send a letter saying he respects her wishes but doesn’t want to play the “telephone game” with a life-changing diagnosis. They also indicate that it’s important family medical information, should she ever have children.