Idiot Man Won’t See Any Of This Coming!

Ever dated a garbage man? Not a guy who collects trash on the back of those trucks, but a man who has the emotional range of a piece of garbage. Despite protests from literally every family member, poor Sara stuck around with Paul for four extremely long years. Eliza, Sara’s little sister, was apparently too young to be taken seriously when she would complain about her sister’s boyfriend. Unfortunately, it took a tiny bit of miraculous news, followed by an onslaught of bizarre pettiness, for Sara to realize how terrible Paul truly was. But what could she do? Well it turns out she didn’t have to do anything, because Eliza would arrive with a secret weapon, unleashing some unbelievably satisfying revenge on idiot Paul. Seriously, his face must have been locked into a permanent cringe after Eliza was through with him.
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Who’s Really Struggling Here?

The baby news hit Eliza like a ton of bricks. She was only fourteen, and her now-pregnant older sister Sara was twenty-two. Sara was overjoyed, and she and her boyfriend Paul immediately got engaged. Unfortunately, that excitement soon gave way to sheer terror. According to Eliza, “Sara developed hyperemesis (which is a really bad morning sickness). She was constantly in pain, she developed gestational diabetes, and just all around hated the experience.”
Paul ignored all of this and believed he was the most distressed out of anyone in this scenario. He was so sick of Sara’a valid complaining. Eliza recalls him frequently saying, “Your body is built to do this, it can’t be that bad!”
Paul’s inhuman complaining was only dwarfed by his excitement over the possibility that this baby would be born on Valentine’s Day. Paul’s parents, Mr. and Mrs. Doe, merely fueled his seasonal excitement by suggesting the couple name the baby Valentine or Valentino, in order to make the say special for the baby. Well, if Sara wanted her child to be bullied for having a stupid name, then she would go along with that idea! Unfortunately, Paul loved it, despite Eliza’s suggestions of more traditional names. Notice the pattern here of Paul completely ignoring his wife’s feelings and logic altogether.
Well, February rolled around and Sara was so ready to get this baby out of her. By this point, her blood pressure would take these unexpected spikes and dips, so she was forced on bed rest. This baby was going to come on Valentine’s day despite Sara’s wishes otherwise. Unfortunately, this delivery was about to get way more complicated than anyone expected.
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Things Go From Bad To Horrifying

Naturally, Paul refused to be in the delivery room because he thought giving birth was gross. That really boded well for his future as a father. Eliza was forced to stay outside because she was deemed ‘too young’ to be there for her sister. Sixteen hours after Sara went into labor, Eliza officially received her very first nephew. But that was only the beginning of Sara’s troubles. Eliza later found out how, ‘Sara needed an emergency c-section, and while doing the operation, they discovered that the part of her uterus facing her spinal chord had a very severe tumor. Thankfully, it wasn’t cancerous. The doctors were shocked and didn’t understand why nobody noticed it on an ultrasound. The doctors immediately went in for more surgery to remove the tumor, but they ended up performing a full hysterectomy.”
While Sara was struggling with the most intense surgical process imaginable, Paul thought it best to scheme and go behind everyone’s backs to get what he wanted. The rest of us were shocked at how low Paul could sink.
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He Finally Reveals His Master Plan

The rest of the family later found out that Paul was filling out the baby’s paperwork on his own, claiming he wanted to let Sara rest, but he probably didn’t want any pushback from her. Well guess what? Paul forged Sara’s signature on the paperwork, legally naming his new son Valentino without Sara’s permission. Somehow, Paul was never brought up on forgery charges because Paul’s parents claimed to be ‘witnesses’ to Sara signing the papers, even though the rest of Sara’s family knew this was utter nonsense.
What else could Sara do? She immediately dumped Paul and changed her son’s name a month later. Sara wanted to be the bigger person and arrange a joint custody of her son with Paul. Surprising no one, Paul completely vanished from Sara’s life, never responding to ay of her phone calls or messages. That is, until Sara’s friend was tagged in Paul’s new wedding photos on Facebook. Eliza will never forget how, “Paul had apparently started cheating on Sara not long after she got pregnant. Sara was livid, but there wasn’t much she could do, so she filed for child support and continued to live her best life.”
Yep, Sara knew that revenge couldn’t just happen overnight, and she had to wait for the perfect opportunity to get back at this garbage man. Fortunately, Eliza came across the perfect opportunity, sitting right in front of her one fateful day.
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Uncovering The Perfect Opportunity For Revenge

It took six years for the perfect revenge to plop itself into Eliza’s lap. In those years, Sara became a cool mom, raising her son all by herself. Eliza had become a popular hairdresser in the area. Who else should walk in one day but Paul’s wife! Her name was Jane, and she didn’t recognize Eliza at all. According to the friend online who was tagged in Paul’s fateful wedding photos, Jane had no idea about Sara, or the fact that she was the other woman all along. Apparently she didn’t even know that Paul already had a child he barely paid child support for! Jane was also super pregnant, so much of the conversation was focused on the new baby. Apparently Paul wasn’t very sympathetic towards this pregnant woman too (big surprise), and she was still looking for a name for the kid. Eliza realized this was her chance. She knew just how to twist the knife in Paul’s guy and make him never forget how poorly he treated Sara and the rest of her family.
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Her Foolproof Plan

Eliza, with as much innocence in her voice as she could muster, asked Jane what names she was thinking of. Jane mentioned how she really wanted something unique and unusual, but not something with an absurd spelling. Paul had suggested so many already, but apparently Jane hated all of them. Eliza, truly embracing her conniving nature, suggested that Jane name her baby Sara. Apparently, that was just what Jane was looking for. The appointment ended, and Jane left the salon. Eliza didn’t hear any more updates until several months later, when Eliza decided to finally do some internet sleuthing. According to Jane’s social media profile, her new baby was in fact named Sara. Now, Paul had a daughter with his ex’s name, reminding him every day about her, as well as how he really needed to pay child support. Over the next few years, Sara’s son had no contact with Paul, but the rest of the family sometimes called the nephew ‘Val’ as a joke. Sara has also been seeing this guy who is fantastic and is like the father that little Val never had. No word on what else befell Paul and his wife, who definitely deserved better than this idiot man. Maybe he eventually came to his sense and thought that maybe he should pay the child support he was legally obligated to? But wow, Eliza waited for what was quite possibly the best revenge against Paul. Sara couldn’t believe how petty and satisfying the entire thing was. Revenge truly is a dish best served after waiting six years for the perfect moment.
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