These people have been made aware of some deep information about their date. And upon learning the information, it made them completely rethink the concept of first dates.
Tinder Date’s Baggage
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“I met a 22-year-old girl on Tinder who told me she wanted to take it slow as her last relationship had given her a small trauma.
I said no problem with me, there is no rush. Then after a nice date, she told me sorry again about not sleeping together that night, that the trauma was she agreed to not use any protection, with her last boyfriend and got pregnant, so she had to have an abortion.
I told her: ‘That’s fine, we are sometimes stupid when we are young.’
Then she said: ‘I started testing negative on pregnancy tests last week; it has taken over a month since I ended my pregnancy!'”
It Made Her Question His Honesty
“When the guys said: ‘Yeah, I’m a high-functioning sociopath.’
I wasn’t phased by the crazy estranged ex-wife or the daughter he doesn’t get to see, but that one took the cake. I even tried to rationalize it, and this is what I came up with:
Option 1: He’s lying. Wow, what a great basis for a relationship. Yeah, no.
Option 2: He’s self-diagnosed. That either indicates that he doesn’t know what a sociopath is or that he does and still thinks that it’s a good thing.
Option 3: He has a diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder with sociopath tendencies and doesn’t care. This is the creepiest option with the most explosive potential.
Option 4: He has the diagnosis and genuinely wants to change. Well, that’s all fine and dandy, but just knowing that sets me up for a situation in which I’d constantly second guess every word he says as a lie and I can’t live with that. Not with my own history of trauma and mental illness.
So yeah, there’s no way that relationship could have started or ended well.”
His Lack Of Luck With Women
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“I’ve got a few.
One said I would have to get screened because she didn’t use protection due to an allergy to latex. This sounds kind of reasonable except for the fact that we had only met five minutes before and had barely spoken to each other. She also went on to tell me she lives with two of her exes. And that she is having a wild affair with her other roommate that the exes don’t know about. This person was a mess.
I went on a first date where the woman showed up so wasted she had a hard time keeping it together. At one point, she was pointing at her arms and saying, ‘Do you know who made these? Yoga made these.’ And then she started crying and talking about her dad who was a big-time yoga master. And then she says, ‘Baby does what daddy tells her.’ That was a rough one.
And THEN there was this one first date with an insurance agent. She looked so bored like she wanted to leave immediately. Anyways, after an hour, she got excited and out of nowhere was like, ‘What kind of adult content do you like?’ Which seemed like an exciting development. I kind of answered, not sure where this was going. And she looked bored with my answers. Then she goes, ‘Well I like to watch videos of real straight guys putting things in places they shouldn’t go, like big ones!’ She said it like I was supposed to be happy for her. We didn’t hook up, although, one time out of boredom, a year later, I invited her out to a bar and we watched ‘The Fellowship of The Ring’ with closed captions at a bar and didn’t talk much.”
The Blind Date That Crossed The Line!
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“I’ve had so many. It’s part of the reason I had shut down all online dating and banned blind dates.
Blind date: He took me to one of those Christmas light displays you walk through and get hot cocoa and stuff. It was cute, and so was he. Until he got down on one knee, pulled out a ‘promise ring’ and asked me to be his girlfriend. Apparently, it was only a blind date to me – he knew who I was and had ultimately decided I was ‘the one’ for him.
The Quarter Cowboy: I met a new security guard that worked for my company and agreed to grab drinks one day after work. The plan was he could come and meet me at the local Happy Hour place and we could just go from there. He walked in and I wanted to melt through the floor. NOT because I found him extremely attractive. OH NO. He had gone from his uniform into some modern day ‘cowboy’ attire. Super tight, short sleeved, button up black shirt with not one, not two, not three, but FOUR buttons undone. Painted on black jeans, cowboy boots with actual spurs on the back of them, and a GIANT black cowboy hat. His preferred method of payment? Rolls of quarters. He had 10 rolls of quarters on him.
Met a guy on Plenty of Fish. He was a little awkward, but honestly, I just wanted to get laid at the time. He insisted upon being a gentleman and doing the whole dinner and a movie thing beforehand. Fine. We went to the movie (Deadpool, I believe), and then back to his house for an ‘authentic Italian meal.’ It was not Italian, whatsoever, which was fine. He put forth an effort and all, so I wasn’t going to ruin it by being that girl. But he wouldn’t shut up about it. Asking me if it was ‘just like Grandma used to make.’
Finally, I was just like, well this isn’t a dish that I know, but it’s good, nonetheless.
He disagreed with me, saying that he always made that for ALL the Italian people he knows and they all swear it’s the best thing since Lasagna or whatever. Ok, I’m not straight off the boat from Italy here, my great grandmother was Italian. I have the stereotypical dark eyes, hair, and skin, but I don’t speak Italian, and I think Olive Garden is the best.
Once we got through dinner, we sat down to watch another movie ‘to digest.’ Digest meant he did his best Koala impersonation on me. He was tangled around me. Legs around my waist, arms around my neck, it was so uncomfortable. His cat walked into the room and I was like OH I love cats! To which he responded: ‘We love you, too.’
I left. That was the last straw for me.”
The Cheapskate That Creeped Her Out
“I met this guy on Tinder, and he seemed cool, but lived an hour away. He insisted on driving to my town to meet me. He gets there, and we meet on neutral public grounds, and he seems ok, but a bit weird. He says he looked up a place on TripAdvisor and we had to go! It’s some semi-fancy Italian restaurant. I say, can’t we just go to one of the many places I know in my town?
He says, nope. It has to be this Italian place. Hop in, I’ll drive.
Now, I don’t generally get in the car with strangers, because I’m not an idiot. But that day, I guess, I was an idiot.
We get there, and he’s telling me about his mom, and other things I don’t remember, and I’m trying to find the cheapest thing on the menu because I’m broke and never expect my meal to be paid for, even when the dude won’t let me have any say in the fancy restaurant choosing.
He, of course, orders like a $20 meal and makes me eat some of it. Ew. So gross.
So then we’re done and he’s like, ‘So, can you pick it up this time? I made the drive, and gave you a ride here.’ I get the last bit of money I have and begrudgingly pay for our meals, because I know I have no ride back to my car if I don’t. I should have just called a friend. Like I said, I was being dumb. So I pay, we leave and get back in his car, where we just sit. And I’m like, so are you going to take me back to my car?
He goes: ‘Your skin reminds me of leather.’
What. The. Heck.
‘It turns me on.’
Oh boy.
I say: ‘Uh, that’s nice. So, are we going?’
‘My mom would like you, I think.’
‘Okay. Well, I’m supposed to be home soon; my roommate is probably getting worried.’
‘Oh, shame you have a roommate, I thought maybe we could go back to your place… you know… watch a movie, get comfortable?’
‘No. Not happening.’
‘Come on, I made the drive and everything, I don’t get to see your room?’
‘No.’
So he drives me back to my car after an eternity, and we part ways, and he texts me I guess when he gets home and is like: ‘That was great, can’t wait to do it again and maybe get to see your place next time’
So I said: ‘I’m sorry, I’m glad you had a great time but I’m just not sure we are a great fit.’
Cue absolutely losing his cool. I’m a worthless piece of garbage, ‘How dare I, he is a (well-known last name) for god sakes he doesn’t get REJECTED. I should be HONORED I got the PRIVILEGE.’ It honestly scared me.
That’s the day I downloaded a tracker app on my phone and told my friends when I went on dates with dudes so they could make sure I wasn’t being abducted.”
Comparing Himself to ‘Dexter’?
“I’d met this dude one weekend. After a little bit of texting, we decide to meet up. Dude shows up to hang out after I get off work at a mall and we go up to the food court to grab a quick bite before finding something to do. He sits down with his food and begins meticulously entering it into his calorie counter before he even starts eating narrating the whole time while telling me he just has to go to Starbucks to get a ‘super sweet white girl drink’ after this and it’s so hard to account for that in his daily calorie allowance.
We decide to go ice skating. Somehow this turns into the entire history of his relationship with his ex-wife, and him telling me the character he relates to most is Dexter because he’s also a narcissistic sociopath who isn’t capable of caring about anyone.
He starts talking about his other date later that night to make sure, ‘I wasn’t taking this too seriously because he doesn’t give a care about it.’
We’re in his car driving to the rink and he pulls a machete out from under his seat and tells me he keeps it there for ‘protection.’
We never talked after that.”
A Horrible eHarmony Date
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“I was on my first eHarmony date and the date was going well.
Then, out of nowhere, I hear:
‘My aunt murdered my uncle, my sister is married to the devil and they will shake me down on Christmas. I was a nurse but got fired for taking narcotics. I also have MS, live with my parents, and I don’t have a license. I need a ride home.’
I deleted eHarmony after that.”
She Sounds Like A Nightmare Date!
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“Her father is in jail, pending trial, after (allegedly) embezzling his clients’ funds to the tune of the low eight-figures. Her mother is having an emotional breakdown and can’t handle it, so she used whatever of her father’s assets haven’t been frozen and signed a three-year lease in a luxury apartment blocks from the beach and bought a 2017 BMW to get away from all the stress.
Then she told me she hates Asians and did the slant eye motion. We were at a sushi restaurant.
Other highlights from this date:
She didn’t believe cars could get flat tires (her brand new BMW had run-flat tires that would last 50 miles, but no, flat tires are impossible now).
She thought ‘Sully’ was a made-up story, despite the fact that she lived in New York City in January 2009.
She also told me how many kids she wanted to have and what to name them.”
Where Did His Accent Go?
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“I met up with a guy from Match. We had chatted a bit and he seemed pretty interesting. He told me he moved to Canada from Scotland when he was 19 years old.
I meet up with him. He immediately starts questioning if I’m me, he wants to see my leg tattoo as ‘proof’ (middle of winter, so, no). Anyway, if that wasn’t weird enough. I was surprised that a person who lived in Scotland for so long doesn’t have a hint of an accent.
So I asked him, and his response was: ‘My accent comes out when I rap.’
And then he went on a huge tirade about how the local rappers were trying to keep him down, and that he’s going to be the next ‘Beastie Boy.’ I excused myself to go to the bathroom, got in my car and hauled out of there.”
A Downhill Date
“There was one date where the guy told me he recently broke up with his fiancee and was fighting to get the engagement ring back from her.
Then there was a Tinder date where the guy asked if I would be interested in a threesome with his girlfriend.
There was one where I myself overshared. This guy was talking about how some dude he went to high school with murdered someone, so I guess he thought it would be a good idea to ask if I had known anyone who had been murdered. I said yeah and I didn’t want to talk about it, but he was being pushy. I told him my dad killed my stepmom when I was in middle school.
The date was already going downhill at this point, so I told him I had to leave because I had to be at work early the next day. I proceeded to head to a karaoke bar my friends were hanging out at and sang songs with them all night.”
Why She No Longer Participates In Online Dating
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“I met a guy at a bar. In less than an hour, he was extremely wasted and talking incessantly about his girlfriend who had dumped him and how much he missed her.
1) He said he couldn’t meet where we’d agreed, would I meet him somewhere else; I agreed not thinking about it. Another place was a good 30 minutes away from the first meeting place. He admitted within the first hour his wife had left him because he was addicted to online adult content. They were still married, and she was harassing and stalking him, which was why he couldn’t meet at first place.
2) He admitted within the first half hour, that his girlfriend kicked him out for hitting up other girls online and he was living in a tent in his daughter’s backyard.
3) I realized less than two minutes into the date, the guy was mentally challenged and worse, desperate, and I was the only girl who had ever agreed to go out with him, so he was immediately ‘fixated’ on me.
4) He admitted five minutes into the date he had married a much older woman who had been his first lover when he was only 16 and that he was, essentially, her ‘slave’ and he was looking for another woman who would be his Dom and ‘owner.'”
His Ex-Wife
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“One of the more recent weird/uncomfortable dates involved a man no taller than five feet. He was a trucker that worked during the week in my city and went home to another state every weekend. He used to be in a Gene Autry-esque cowboy band, and not only texted me sound bites of his music before we met, he had me listen to it on the car ride home.
The date was spent talking about his previous marriage. And how, despite her wanting out, he refused to agree to a divorce. So she cheated on him with his brother and continued hanging out with the brother after they’d been caught, but he stayed with her so long because ‘he’s a good guy.’
But now that he’s single, he spends all his time at a tiki bar singing karaoke, and maybe I’d like to come watch on the next date.
As he described his karaoke ritual, it became clear that he goes every weeknight and closes the place down, but only drinking water and no food (bet the waitstaff love him). The drive home, as I mentioned, involved him putting on his own album. It wasn’t good.”
She Was Using Him?
“One of the first times I tried OkCupid (2012, I was 21 at the time), I met a 30-year-old woman. I didn’t think much of it; she was attractive and my age preference range was open at the time.
We meet up for coffee and an easy walk down one of our local beaches. She seems chill and we talk and get to know each other. But, near the end, we sit down and keep talking and she says, ‘I need to tell you why I asked you out and talked to you.’
I figure, ‘Well, am I getting punked?’ It was 11 a.m. and we were in broad daylight with people around, so I wasn’t afraid of anything sketchy, just knew what was going to come next was going be ‘fun.’
So, it turns out, she was married. But, apparently her husband had cheated on her, and they had been talking and their ‘compromise’ was that she could cheat on him with whomever she wanted and I was one of the guys she was scoping out to be her Sancho.
While I was attracted to her and was considering just doing it, at the time, I had a weird moment of wise choices and ended up just telling her that I thought her and her guy should go get counseling and talk things out more and just gave the most mature/logical advice I could for the time.
We parted ways and she kept texting me and sent some photos through the week. I almost caved in and just went for it one night, but I just told her I didn’t want to talk anymore and that was that.
Yeah, could have been an easy jump into bed but there was just ‘something’ about the whole situation that rubbed me very much the wrong way, and I just went with my gut and took the high ground.
Thanks, Ok Cupid!”
Life Conditions And Fears
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“These three things all on the same date:
1) She has a chronic medical condition involving her pancreas. I don’t remember the details now, but it was weird to bring up.
2) She bragged about being nearly $200,000 in debt with no job prospects. She was an archaeology major with a focus on Celtic architecture. But we live in the US, so there’s nothing here related to that.
3) She had a crippling phobia of telephones. She can text, but speaking on a phone was out if the question because when she was 8 years old, her sister’s boyfriend prank called her and she never got over it.”
The Guy From OkCupid
“I went on two dates with this guy I met on OkCupid a while back.
The first date was awkward – we went for coffee in a local Starbucks and ran out of things to talk about after 30 minutes. I had to invent a fake emergency to get out of it. Despite this, everyone around me kept saying to give him a second chance; that it was probably just nerves. Despite my better judgment, I gave him a second date.
We went to my favorite sushi restaurant and after 20 minutes, there was a lull in the conversation. He then grabs my hand and caresses it in a really creepy way whilst saying: ‘I’m glad I found you. It’s been so rough since my father murdered that junkie.’
NOPE. NOPE. ABORT MISSION! I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. Turns out his father was a hardcore illegal substance addict who murdered another junkie after a deal went wrong. Too many major red flags went off when I heard that and combined with the clinginess/creep factor, I decided to get out and never looked back.
I blocked him on OKCupid, deleted my profile and blocked him on Facebook. Might have been a bit extreme looking back but I’ll be darned if I get into some serious baggage with a hairy, clingy weirdo whose father murdered someone.”