Meeting someone famous can be an exciting event, yet the star in question might not always leave the encounter with the best taste in their mouth. These average joes know this all to well, as they recount their celebrity encounters that, whether intentional or not, cause the star to becomes royally
Usher Got It Bad.
“I worked on private jets and cargo planes when I was in college. Usher came in one time on a chartered Gulfstream IV. It was the winter in Michigan and the weather was terrible. One of our female receptionist was a huge, huge fan of his so when he was getting off the plane she attempted to get him to sign something. His bodyguard jumped in and physically threw the girl away. She was like 95 lbs, an employee of the airport and clearly not a threat to him. Usher just shook his head at her and got in his limo with a grin. She was pretty upset about the whole deal, and I was flamingly ticked that Usher was such a jerk. When it came time for his plane to leave, it needed to be de-iced. I sent the de-icing truck to a completely different ramp to do a large job (that I made up). The truck didn’t come back for about an hour. His pilots were whining to us on the radio how Usher needed to be in someplace for a meeting… Oh well, too bad. Screw Usher.”
Bear Grylls Is Pissed About Piss.
“I ran into Bear Grylls at Union Station in DC and I told him how much I loved his show. We then shook hands and me being the nervous idiot that I am said, ‘Wow, you have small hands’ to which he replied, ‘Well your mom doesn’t seem to mind’ and headed off. Owned by the pee drinker of all pee drinkers.”
Keanu Reeves Thought It Was Bogus.
“Brother played pool with Keanu Reeves in Australia. Every time Reeves missed a shot my brother would go, ‘Bogus.’
After a while Keanu was saying, ‘Shut up, dude.'”
Alec Baldwin Has No Chill.
“I was in New York with my dad who hadn’t been in a long time and he really wanted to go on the studio tour at NBC so I begrudgingly agreed. The tour was exactly the same tour that it was the other times I’d been dragged on it by people I was in the city with, but when we left the building, they had cordoned off the whole side of the building to film a scene for ’30 Rock.’ I was walking while looking over my shoulder to talk to my dad and then I bumped into someone who spilled coffee all over his nice suit. That person was Alec Baldwin. He started cursing at me in frustration and a nearby African-American gentleman came to my defense. That person was Tracy Morgan. As they were arguing over this incident, my father and I quickly walked passed the barricades and out of the area that they were filming in.”
“Batman Told Me To Go To Hell.”
“I was at a horror convention years ago, where Adam West was one of the guests. As I was coming back in from outside the convention center, I noticed he was leaving so I held open the door for him. ‘Have a good evening, Mister West!’ I said. He turned around, rolled his eyes, and snorted, ‘Whatever.’ This royally ticked me off. So I responded, without thinking, ‘Wow, you’re a prick!’ He turned back to me, and growled in that Adam West voice, ‘Go to Hell!’ Yeah, Batman told me to go to Hell.”
John C. Reilly Was Definitely Not Amused.
“A friend of mine once shoved John C. Reilly’s wife out of the way while attempting to get an autograph from him. After he asked her, ‘Did you just punch my wife in the face to try to get to me?’ that about sealed the no-autograph deal.”
They Were Keeping Up With The Kardashians Alright.
“Was in Breckenridge Co. for skiing. Happened to be the same week ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians’ was filming in town and on the slopes. Friends and I made it our mission to be sure they didn’t get any footage they could use. Considering there were about 40 of us in our friends and friends-of-friends group, we made a pretty fair go of it. STORIES: A small group of us ran into them with their film crew in town. They were doing one of those ‘we’re just normal people walking down the street talking’ things with the cameras on. We would walk right behind them and talk really loud so the mics would pick us up. I heard later that night that another of our group ran right between Kim and other Kardashian (IDK their names) and screamed right in the camera, ‘Leave me alone, I just want to live my life!!!’ then ran off. Whenever they were on the slopes, we made a practice of skiing between them and the cameras. We weren’t the only ones; I don’t think any of the townies wanted them there either. I watched the episode they filmed that week. No in town footage and only about 30 seconds of on the slopes footage. Victory.”
Sylvester Stallone Was Throwing A B—h Fit.
“Sylvester Stallone. I was an extra in ‘Driven’ when I was 13 and I stepped on his foot. He threw a fit and made security stand around him and shoo people off anytime he wasn’t filming for the rest of the day.”
Surely Regis Philbin Is A Millionaire.
“Met Regis Philbin and asked him if he wanted to be a millionaire. He was pretty ticked off by that for some reason.”
They Know Who You Are Kobe Bryant, And They Don’t Care.
“Kobe Bryant. I heard this story from a guy who works at Disneyland. So Kobe pulls into the Disneyland parking structure and instead of adhering to the parking attendant’s instructions, he parks laterally across 4 parking spaces. The attendant rushes up to the car and says, ‘Sir, you can’t do that!’ Kobe steps out of the car and yells repeatedly, ‘Do you know who I am?! Do you know who I am?!’ Taunting them a-la hardwood floor style, he walks away (I imagine him jogging backwards while giving himself slaps on the buttocks). The parking people come up with a clever idea after he’s gone and decide to surround his car with a bunch of other parked cars. I imagine he was ticked when he returned. I laughed.”
An Encounter Kevin Spacey Wouldn’t Soon Forget.
“One of my friends got to meet Kevin Spacey after a performance at a theater. Anyway, she was bound and determined to say something awesome to him, so when he went to sign her playbill, she just kind of clutched it and whispered, ‘You are spectacular.’ He gave her this horrible look and walked away. A few months later, he was on Leno to promote the newest Superman and was asked about meeting fans outside the theater. I then got to watch, on national television, Spacey talk about how badly my friend creeped him out.”
Eh, Chad Kroger’s Music Probably Messed His Chances Up First
“I messed up Chad Kroger of Nickelback’s chances to get laid… I was at a bar when I was living in Vancouver, ashamedly roasted. The Roxy, if you want to know where Vancouver’s rich and infamous hang out, alongside other roasted idiots like myself. He was talking to a girl and touching her face and I walked up and just barged in between them. I asked if he was who I thought he was, then proceeded to tell him I liked two of his songs (I was a bit toasty, after all). He didn’t understand because I was slurring and speaking in my thick Northern English accent. He asked me what I had said and I explained, and went on to do a rendition of two of the songs. In this time, the girl walked off. I got some play from someone that night too. Pretty successful evening, I’d say.”
Luke Wilson Doesn’t Like Cussing?
“My co-workers and I were out celebrating at a local bar, getting kind of loud and rowdy, and out of nowhere, some lady comes up to us and says, ‘You need to stop cussing. Luke doesn’t like cussing.’ We look around for what in the world she could be talking about, and realize the guy who’d been monopolizing the pool table all night was Luke Wilson. I looked at her and realized she was his assistant and he and all his entourage were looking at us waiting for us to apologize. I, being totally sloshed already, said to the entire bar (at my loudest possible voice), ‘EFF LUKE WILSON. HE’S A DOUCHE ANYWAY.’ This of course ticked him off something fierce. We ignore him and go back to drinking and bragging about our massive take in sales that week. A few minutes later, the bar manager or owner came up to us and asked us to leave because we were disturbing other guests. (I paraphrase my response here because being as sloshed as I was I probably was no where near this smooth) I just looked at him, looked at LW’s group and said, ‘Look at our table, we each have had a few drinks and are going to sit right here and have a few more. Now look at Puke Wilson and his tables. He’s the only one allowed to drink of his group, and all the rest are just taking up space that is costing you money. Also, we’re local. If we have a good time here, we’re not only likely to come back, but we’ll bring even more friends with us. Collectively, we all make as much as he does, and since each of us is buying, and he’s probably never coming back to this town or bar again in his life. You’d do much better to kick him out.’ At that, I flagged down a waitress for another round, turned away from the manager without another look. Five minutes later the guys across from me started laughing their butts off. When I turn around, I notice that Wilson and his posse were clearing out. Never watched another of his movies again.”
Steve Buscemi Shut Down The Party.
“Last year Steve Buscemi’s son, of whom I am an acquaintance, threw a party at their house. I came with a few of my friends who were tight with his son. I got a little toasty and broke a vase. Steve Buscemi came home shortly after and kicked us all out as a result of my vase-breaking.”
RIP Billy Mays.
“I was messing around with my friend in a huge crowd at our local Walmart and ended up throwing a football right into the crowd. Turns out it hit Billy Mays in the junk.”
Don’t Ever Tick Off Samuel L. Jackson.
“I didn’t tick off a celebrity, but some other guy did. It was almost me who ticked him off. I was standing in line behind Samuel L. Jackson at a football game (apparently he is at Steelers games often), and after a long internal struggle to work up the courage to say something, some jerk came along and started creaming his pants over the guy, taking pictures with him, asking for his autograph and talking about how he’s his biggest fan in the whole wide world. He looked pretty ticked off about it once the guy finally left, and I’ve seen enough of his movies to learn that I shouldn’t tick him off.”
Matthew Broderick Heard Every Word.
“Well, my wife dumped hot soup in Steven Seagal’s lap while he was wearing some kimono or something at a ranch in Montana. And I ticked off Mark Gastineau by asking for an autograph after his playing days (we were playing basketball at the apartment complex where he lived). But worst of all: I said some crap loudly about Sarah Jessica Parker as we were passing the theater where ‘The Producers’ was playing. It was midnight and I thought no one was around. Unfortunately she, Matthew Broderick and his parents were all getting into a limo right in front of us. I still feel bad about the look Broderick gave me.”
Asking A Bad Question To Bad Finger.
“I was working in a radio station and the rock group Bad Finger was doing a show in town that night. I got a call out of the blue saying, ‘Hey, they are coming down to the station. Interview them.’ Well, I didn’t know anything about Bad Finger, so quickly ransacked the music library and found the only 2 Bad Finger records that we had. I noticed they were both written by Peter Hamm. So, the group comes into the studio and, it’s a live interview, and they are joking and babbling and rock-bandy like… fun guys, and they introduce themselves and I ask… ‘So, where is Peter Hamm?’
And they fall silent, and one of them said, ‘He’s late…’
And I said, ‘Well, when he is going to get here?’
And they repeated, ‘He’s LATE.’ It was then I realized that British English is a bit different. Turns out Peter had put a bullet in his brain a few years back.”
Phil Colins’ Anger Was In The Air That Night.
“I royally ticked off Phil Collins of the band Genesis. Arrived late to their concert in ’82, had 8 reserved seats very near the stage that were occupied, had an usher boot the people camping in our seats waving a flashlight in total darkness while Phil is trying to sing the opening song to their concert. When we finally got to sit down we received the angriest stare from him that caused half the arena of people all to look over at us like we were a bunch of jerks. It was a 16,000 seat arena sold out. Hey Phil! Sorry ’bout that… it was the jerks who stole our seats that caused the whole ruckus.”
Roger Daltrey Was Asking “Who The Heck Are You? Who, Who, Who, Who?”
“I broke Roger Daltrey’s kitchen drawer. For a man who regularly trashed hotel rooms, he seemed a bit upset over a drawer. He was our next door neighbor. We didn’t see much of him really, but when he held parties they were loud and scared the nearby farm animals. He avoided complaints by inviting all the neighbors. This party was just after Pete Townshend had avoided his charges, so he was there along with Elvis Costello and a bunch of possibly famous old rockers I didn’t really recognize. The damage was a lot more boring than the party – I opened a drawer to find a fork and the runner fell off the side. The resulting clatter got his attention and gave me a nasty look for distracting him.”
Making Jessica Simpson Cry.
“When my dad was still in the Navy, he and his superior made Jessica Simpson cry. She had been doing a Christmas concert for the troops and when she came back my dad and his master chief agreed that something was wrong on the helicopter she was supposed to take back home. She got really upset and started crying and asking why she couldn’t go home to be with her family on Christmas. My dad was dumbstruck by the question but master chief wonderful didn’t miss a beat. ‘Lady, I have hundreds of men and women here who won’t get to spend Christmas with their families and you’re gonna cry to me about it.’ The stupid helicopter still got fixed though.”
How Not To Talk To Peter Dinklage.
“I started college in NY and my first week in town I saw Peter Dinklage walking down the street. I was waiting on the curb when I spotted him walking a Great Dane as tall as him, coming towards me. He stopped next to me to wait for the walk sign. Having never seen a celebrity before and still a stupid teenager, I was dumbfounded. I stood there a few seconds staring at him before I realized I was being rude. Now I had to say something because I couldn’t just stare at the guy until he walked away. ‘A-Are you Peter Dinklage?’
He looked up with a tired expression before dipping his head. ‘Yes, I am.’
OK, said something, done. But what now? I couldn’t just ask the dude his name and then not say anything. I scoured my brain for a compliment. ‘You’re awesome.’
I’m not sure if he even looked up this time. ‘Thanks.’ Shoot! That was dumb. That was really dumb; he thinks I’m an idiot. He probably thinks I just watched ‘Elf’ or something. Gotta prove myself.
‘Yeah… The Station Agent… awesome.’
‘Thanks.’ The WALK light came on and we started to cross the street. When it became obvious I was going left on the other side, he headed right.”
The Quickest Way To Get A Rise Out Of R. Kelly…
“I live in the Chicagoland area and this was a couple months after that R. Kelly stuff happened, he was still all over the news here. My cousin was probably 15 or 16 at the time and she saw him at the mall in a shoe store. Apparently he was very nice and had a bodyguard with him and she asked if she could hug him and get an autograph and he said sure. Well when she went in for the hug she said in his ear, ‘You can have me any time, I wouldn’t tell anyone!’ She said she left ASAP after seeing the look on his face.”
Paris Hilton? Ewwwwwwwww.
“Paris Hilton was visiting Aspen over Christmas in ’09, and she likes to think that she owns the town when she’s there, but in actuality all of the locals hate her. She walked into one of the restaurants there and literally announced: ‘Paris is here!’
I kid you not, one of the guys from the back of the restaurant goes, ‘Paris Hilton? Ewwwwwwwwww!’ Many laughs across the room were had, and she left in shame.”
Has Jeremy Clarkson Ever Been Classy?
“Jeremy Clarkson. Went to get an autograph when I was about 10, and then he said as he signed it, ‘Great, now everyone is going to want a freaking autograph thanks to you.’ Classy.” (Source).
Getting Blocked By Stephen Fry.
“Stephen Fry has me blocked on Twitter. I don’t know why.”
Wil Wheaton Probably Gets Asked That Alot.
“I think I ticked off Wil Wheaton at Comic Con by asking him for a photo with my friend. To be expected, I guess?”
James Bond, ‘The Simpsons’ And Roger Moore.
“I once asked Roger Moore to sign a picture of Sean Connery for me. I was polite about it and explained the Simpsons reference. He was bemused, but he signed my picture and shook my hand, then turned to the assembly and asked, ‘Does anybody else have any esoteric items for me to sign? A Timothy Dalton, perhaps? Dare I say it, a rare George Lazenby?’ Class act, Roger Moore.” (Source).