It turns out, not everyone loves surprise parties. These are some examples of how terrible a surprise party can go, no matter how well-intentioned.
(Content has edited for clarity.)
One Angry Uncle
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“A few years back we threw a surprise party for my Uncle Tommy. It was going be at the Elks Club where he was Vice President. We all got set up and ready to go and were waiting. They were supposed to arrive at 6 p.m. It got to be 7:30 p.m. and we were getting worried
It turns out my aunt was going to take my uncle to the park for a romantic walk and then she would bring him to the club and he’d be shocked, but they got into a huge fight and he wanted to go home. Eventually, she convinced him to come, and when he walked in he said ‘Yeah, I heard her talking about this three weeks ago. I told the witch I didn’t want a party and here we go, a party.’ He knocked all the presents off the table, punched the cake, and left.
He filed for divorce the next week and then moved to Florida.”
Oh, That’s Embarrassing
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“In high school, I was responsible for keeping a friend busy while her parents set everything up at their house for the party. We get back to her house, all lights are off, she walks in the door and announces ‘I have to take a huge poop!’ Lights turn on. ‘Surprise!’ Embarrassment ensues.”
Surprise! You’re Dead!
“The person we were throwing the 63rd birthday party for was coming back from a trip with his wife and we (50+ people) were in the backyard with all the decorations set up and food. His wife texted us when they were five minutes away, and we all gathered near the fence gate where they would soon enter (the fence was about seven feet tall, so you couldn’t see anything over it). When they entered, we all yelled surprise, and his face looked like he was about to sneeze, but instead, he was having a stroke and ended up in the hospital for the evening. The food was good though.”
A Couple Of Drinkers Ruin It
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“One of my roommates had a girlfriend who was sweet, but clingy, controlling and a hardcore drinker. She decided to throw a surprise birthday party for this roommate, Kody and had been planning it for an entire month beforehand. She invited all his friends, recruited me and the other roommates to help decorate the apartment and fix some food, had posters and banner printed out, and baked a HUGE elaborate cake.
The day of the party, he came home four hours early. The girlfriend is crushed and spends the next half hour screaming at him about how he’d ruined everything. We finally convince her that all is not lost and finish decorating while Kody sleeps.
A note about Kody: at the time, he worked nights at a bar. He normally slept during the day and was awake at night, but today he’d been asked to work a double shift for some reason. When he arrived home that day he’d been up for at least 24 hours.
Anyway, a few hours later, the guests arrive and everyone is having a good time except for the girlfriend who is still distraught the surprise was ruined, and Kody, who is asleep. The girlfriend gets outrageously wasted and spends an hour or so trying to get Kody out of bed to enjoy this party she threw for him, and he isn’t having any of it. When she finally manages to drag him out of bed, he pounds a few shots, we sing happy birthday, and he passes out again. The girlfriend, at this point, gives up and passes out on the floor in his bedroom.
So the rest of the night was spent partying with these people we didn’t know and then cleaning up. We left up most of the decorations for Kody and his girlfriend to take care of in the morning, which they never did. The monstrosity of a cake the girlfriend made sat in our fridge for a week before she remembered it existed.”
A Guy Starts Angry But Changes Tune
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“My now-ex-girlfriend and my mother co-conspired to throw me a surprise party for my 18th birthday in a conference room at a local hotel. I was under the impression that I was going to pick my girlfriend up and we were going to go on a birthday date. I was already a little frustrated because I had made dinner reservations, and by the time she gets in the car, we were already late. She told me this strange story about needing to take her class notes to her friend who was staying at this hotel because her house burned down. I didn’t remember hearing about anyone’s house burning down, and I just wanted to make our dinner reservations on time, frustrations increase. We pulled up outside the hotel and I became more frustrated over the fact that her friend couldn’t just meet her outside. When she told me I had to come in with her, I said something along the lines of, ‘Jesus Christ, Lauren.’
Anyway, we get inside the front doors of the hotel, and the lady at the front desk asks, ‘Are you here for the party?’ I was confused, but I just said, ‘No.’ Well within 30 seconds of walking down the hall, I hear the distinct voice of my friend, Brent from an open door a few feet away. At this point I realize whats going on, grab Lauren and give her a huge kiss, apologized for being such a butthead, ran inside the room and proceeded to have an awkward birthday party (two sets of my friends – church friends and crew friends and then a really bad DJ) but nonetheless, I felt more loved by that party than any other time in my life.
What made the party was at some point I picked up my friend John, lost my balance, and we both went through a wall.
All in all, the surprise was ruined, I felt like the worst, it was a typical awkward high school party, but man, it was fun.”
Almost A Tragedy
“My mom was having a surprise party thrown for her 30th birthday. They flew in the whole family, her parents came, the whole shebang. On the way home from work, she was driving on a mountain road and was hit head first by a truck. She was driving a VW beetle. She was helicoptered to the hospital, needed emergency surgery on her back, etc. So when she woke up in the hospital, they were trying to get her phone number to call the family. She couldn’t remember it.
So, a house full of people were waiting for my mom for like three hours, and eventually, she remembered the number. She was bedridden for six months after that accident. Crazy stuff.”
Scared The You Know What Out Of Him
“My aunt had set-up a surprise 40th birthday party for my uncle. Everyone (about 30 friends, neighbors, relatives) were hiding in the basement waiting for him to come home from work. His car pulls up, he runs to the house, everyone yells ‘SURPRISE!’ and he craps himself. Turns out he had the runs that day and had to poop. We all had to wait until he got a shower for cake. I was 9 years old at the time and couldn’t stop laughing.”
The Wrong Kind Of Surprise
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“A buddy of mine set up a surprise party for his fiancee. She thought he was off to another state for a week for work. He came back early on her birthday and set up a huge surprise party for her at home. She usually gets home at like 6 p.m. from work, and it is already like 7 p.m. and we finally hear her coming we turn off the lights, and she comes home hammered with another dude she was going to bang,
DRAMA was all over the place. It was a huge chaotic argument, people taking sides. My buddy was mad and faked that he was calm and then like a cheetah jumped out of his seat and decked the dude in the face and knocked him out. The guy deserved it; he was a pick-up artist and knew she was engaged. She was just an easy catch, but still, she is at fault and they ended up breaking up.”
Broken Faces Make For Sad Parties
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“A girlfriend of mine punched her aunt in the face and broke her nose because she jumped out right in front of her when they yelled surprise.
One hospital trip later, they decided not to throw surprise parties anymore.”
Not What He Was Hoping For
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“I went out for a romantic dinner with the then-wife. She was being unusually flirty, showing cleavage, goes to the restroom, brings back panties in her hand and gives to me. Says she couldn’t wait to get back home.
So, arrive back home. She tells me to meet in the basement where we have our entertainment room and tv while she changes into something for the evening.
Very excited, I go down the stairs and start taking off my pants.
Surprise!!!! About 30 friends in the basement for an early surprise birthday party.
I fell backward on the stairs, could feel my heart racing and barely covered my junk.
Would rather have had the intended evenings activities. And didn’t end up getting any birthday nookie.”
What Are All These People Doing Here?
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“One time my mom told me that we were running low on funds so we couldn’t have a birthday party and that the best we could do is take me to McDonald’s with my friend (we’ll call him Jack). We get to Jack’s house and my mom tells me that he is out at his pool. I walk over to the gate outside and 20 people jump out and are all like ‘SURPRISE!’ I’m confused, so I walked over to Jack and asked him if he was ready to go to McDonald’s and my mom had to pull me off to the side and explain it was a surprise birthday party. I am not a smart man.”
Very Late To The Party
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“My friends, family, and co-workers planned a surprise birthday party for me at my house. In order to give everyone time to get there and get set up, my coworkers had my boss ask me to stay late at work ‘because we might have an emergency project to do tonight.’
So 5 p.m. rolls around and everyone heads home (really, to my house). I sit around. 6 p.m… 7 p.m… Finally, I text the boss that I’m headed out unless she needs me to stay. Turns out she was supposed to have me go home at 5:30 p.m. ‘because the project didn’t pan out.’ Since I figure my evening is shot anyway, I head to the grocery store, pick up the dry cleaning, drop off the recycling, etc.
I walked in my door around 9 p.m. to find all my friends family and coworkers hammered in my house! They were all a bit too in their cups to muster a coordinated ‘surprise!’ but I figured it out. Ended up having a blast.”
Honest Confusion
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“We threw a surprise party for my brother’s 30th birthday. We did such a good job planning it that he didn’t even have any idea it was for him.
My sister’s birthday is about 10 days before my brother’s, so we told him we were throwing a surprise party for her, since it was before his birthday we figured he wouldn’t suspect a thing. He didn’t. We had him in on the planning of his own party. Asked him for his thoughts on food, drinks, etc.
We had all of his best friends, the entire family (minus my sister, oddly enough) over and he walked through the door. SURPRISE! ‘Uh, dummies, I’m not [sister’s name].’ He looks around and sees all of his friends, it finally registered.
He was grateful for the awesome party, and he had a blast, but his initial reaction made it feel like the biggest failure.”
A Really Bad Set-Up
“More of an ‘I wanted to be a huge jerkoff’ moment.
My birthday. I tell wife ‘let’s have friends over for bbq.’ She says ‘ok.’ I spend the afternoon mowing the yard and setting up the patio, etc. About an hour before people are supposed to show up, wife says I need to help her run to store to get supplies.
I’m filthy, covered in grass and dust, and sweaty as all get out so I say, ‘Let me take a quick shower.’ She says we don’t have time because she needs to start cooking, etc, take a shower when we get back. Ok, ok, I reply, slightly irritated to have to run to market dirty but no biggie, right? Did I mention she’s dressed up? Well, she seems to be dressed nicely for the market or a bbq, but I didn’t think much of it.
Hop in the car, head down the road, (she’s driving) pull into upscale restaurant parking lot. I’m like, ‘Huh?’ Then I see all my friend’s cars parked in parking lot. Darn. Did I mention I was dirty and sweaty? Well, I was dirty and sweaty and smelly.
I wanted so bad to be mean and throw a complete fit and go back home, but I didn’t. I spent the evening in a nice restaurant with my nicely dressed wife and friends while I looked and smelled horribly, pretending to have a nice time.”
A Devastating Birthday
“On my birthday, I confessed my love to the girl I was seeing at the time. She shot me down. Bad. I was a husk of my former self. Just kind of broken. She insisted on hanging around for the next few days saying it was to show she wanted to be my friend still but back then I was too much of a pushover to tell her to leave. On Friday, she dragged me to the movies (Tangled, a love story of all movies), and I couldn’t figure out what she was thinking. Turns out she was planning a surprise party with my friends and didn’t want us breaking up to ruin my birthday. I ended up sitting on the couch with my face buried in a pillow for the entire party.”
Awkward Doesn’t Begin To Describe It
“My buddy’s girlfriend threw him a surprise party at his apartment the day before his birthday. Everyone got in their places when we saw him pull up, waited and waited, then finally looked out to the parking lot to see why he hadn’t come in yet. He was hooking up with some other girl. Then it got awkward.”
The Real Surprise Came Later!
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“My boyfriend at the time and his female friend planned a surprise party for me while I was at work. Was definitely surprised and overjoyed that all my friends were at my house with cake and balloons and drinks. However, after awhile I notice I can’t find my boyfriend or his friend.
Caught him on the porch making out with the girl who helped him set up my surprise party. He forgot I had a security camera pointed at the front door.
Was not a good surprise.”
The Best Of Friends
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“A girl I was dating in high school set up a surprise birthday party for me but chose to not invite most of my good friends because she didn’t like them. Well, they caught wind of this party and took me out for some drinks instead, as their own birthday surprise.
This was before cell phones, so she didn’t have a way to get in touch with me to make up a reason to get me back to her house.
Halfway through the night, one of them spills the whole story, and I decided it wise to make a rather-late appearance. It was awkward walking into a room of her friends, with her crying in the bathroom, needless to say.”
He’d Rather Watch Footy
“A female friend of mine threw a surprise party for her boyfriend (four-year relationship) and invited all his close friends and some of her own friends as well. He was at his mum’s place having a mini party with his family whilst we were all waiting at his place where they (couple) would then be supposedly going out for dinner. We had decorated the house with awesome stuff, brought a DJ to play music and brought nice food, three cakes, and quite expensive presents. It was all adding up to an awesome night. The dude then realizes that something is going on, and after 30 minutes of texting, he tells her that she should bug off since she knows that he hates surprise parties, that he won’t show up, and that he’s going to go watch a football match instead. He checked himself in on Facebook at the match 20 minutes later, ignored our calls and messages; and about an hour later (we were waiting and eating some of the food since we weren’t gonna waste all this awesome stuff on this person), he shows up after half the people left and broke up with her.”
Not As Fun As He Hoped
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“When my son was turning 5 years old, he told us he wanted a surprise birthday party. He gave us the entire rundown on how it was going to go, and we followed his instructions to give him exactly what he wanted. He had been out with his grandma, and when he walked in the door, all 40 of us yelled ‘surprise!’ He just sat down on the floor and cried and refused to even stand up. It took us about 20 minutes to calm him down enough to stop crying.
Needless to say, we won’t be throwing him any more surprise parties. It was pretty funny though. Maybe that’s how I’ll scar him for life, surprise parties every year!”
The DJ Is Unimpressed
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“When I was a DJ, a wife planned a surprise birthday party for her husband (rented a banquet hall, a lot of food, maybe about 150 people). The husband walked in, people yelled ‘surprise,’ and he got this shocked look on his face and went off on his wife accusing her of cheating and so on: ‘IF YOU CAN HOLD THIS A SECRET FROM ME THEN WHO KNOWS WHAT ELSE YOU’RE DOING BEHIND MY BACK!’ A big commotion after that, I packed up and left, no party.”