It takes guts to acknowledge when we are the toxic ones. Yet and still, no one is a stranger to the power of karma, especially when we deserve it the most. Here, people share the unforgettable moments they were humbled after breaking up with their partners in cruel ways.
My Dear Ramona
“About a decade ago I met this beautiful woman at a bar named Ramona. She was there with a couple of friends while I was there alone after a long day at work. Her group sat next to me at the bar. After a few drinks, she randomly started a conversation with me and things took off rather quickly.
I asked for her number and we soon started seeing each other. We never declared each other as ‘boyfriend’ and ‘girlfriend,’ but it was to my understanding that Ramona was seeing me exclusively. I on the other hand was not ready for a committed relationship. My feelings were strong for Ramona, but unfortunately they were not strong enough for me to end my bachelor life, nor were they strong enough to tell Ramona. For about a year, Ramona and I did things as a couple even though I was seeing girls on the side. I was your typical piece of garbage. It didn’t help that Ramona was buying me nice things, helping me pay my rent, and even got to meet my mother. (That was completely on accident).
Over time, I started falling for Ramona. Hard. But I still couldn’t let go of my lifestyle that involved multiple partners. I didn’t feel comfortable settling down because I just knew I was going to screw it up somehow. Well, I was right. The inevitable happened when Ramona called me from her place of work.
She was bawling on the phone as she frantically explained that she had been diagnosed with an STD.
An STD that she got from me.
She swore up and down that I was the only guy she had ever been with. When she asked me if I had been faithful, I finally told her the truth.
‘You’re not the only one, Ramona.’
Long story short, that was the last time I ever spoke to Ramona. She didn’t even bother coming to my apartment to get the few things she left over there. It was no longer her second home, so I collected her things and put them in a box in my coat closet near the door. Years later and I still haven’t settled down. My dear Ramona, on the other hand, married a nice guy and has two beautiful daughters.
I know you’re probably wondering where the karma part comes in. Well, that’s just it. It was only after losing Ramona that I realized how much I actually loved her. Seeing her wedding pictures, her maternity photos, her smiling at another man the same way she used to smile at me, I’m dealing with probably one of the worsts pains I’ve ever had, and it’s all my fault. Sometimes I look at her social media page and just marvel at how much she’s changed. I wonder if she ever thinks about me. The ‘friend request’ button is so inviting, but I never click it because I don’t want to lose her a second time.
I love you Ramona and I always will. I just wish I didn’t wait so late to tell you.”
What Goes Around…
“A few years ago I dated a guy I met online. It was my first time ever using a dating service, but once I was convinced he wasn’t a serial killer, I was absolutely smitten. He was very well put together with a six-figure income, fancy car, and a lovely townhome all in his name. Right off the bat I received criticism because of the fifteen year age gap between us, but he was perhaps the most incredible man I’ve been with to date.
Unfortunately, the longer I was with my ex, the more I realized how boring he was. I had always been outgoing, but once I started dating him, I quickly realized his inability to keep up, both intimately and emotionally. He was sweet, but I was tired of constantly being stressed and unhappy. I couldn’t find a legit reason to break up with him. He was loving and sweet. I was the one with issues.
This went on for about two years before my ex was diagnosed with cancer. At first I felt extremely bad having to drive him to the hospital for chemotherapy and helping him up and down the stairs on his weakest days, but it only made my thoughts about him worse. I know I should have stayed supportive, but I ended up breaking things off with him and simply told him that I was not interested in being a caregiver. At the time my ex said he understood but I could see the pain in his eyes. I moved out and found a place to start fresh. It was a live and learn situation at best.
About a year later, I ended up dating another man. He was an extreme change of pace from my last partner, but I just always knew there was something ‘off’ about him. All of my suspicions proved themselves in three years time when I myself was diagnosed with cancer. It was one hell of a coincidence, but not as much as my new partner being supportive one moment, then breaking things off because he didn’t want the responsibility of caring for a sick person. I felt shattered because we had planned to get married, have kids, etc, but I learned what my ex must have gone through as far as being in love with someone who would up in leave in a heartbeat when things got tough.
I’ve been in remission for about five years now. I find it hard to date again because of how traumatizing the entire ordeal was. I found out through social media that my ex lost his battle to cancer and it’s honestly the worst feeling in the world. I feel like I don’t deserve anything good and anything else that happens to me is completely my fault.”
The Truth Shall Set You Free
“Before I married my ex wife, I had always been a bit of a workaholic. At the time, my wife was also very involved with her career, so it didn’t seem to be a problem at first. We still got to see each other a lot more than I assumed we would. However, it didn’t take long before things started taking a turn for the worst.
For starters, my wife began to constantly ask if and when we would start thinking about having children. What she didn’t know, was that I had a vasectomy in my late twenties. My wife was so passionate about having kids that we often found ourselves arguing about it. For the love of me I just can’t figure out why I just couldn’t tell her before hand. I guess I was sort of in denial, considering we were always so busy before we married. I just sort of assumed she would never want children. I argued that if we hardly had time for our relationship, how on earth would we be able to raise children? Her counter argue was that we would make the time to raise a family, ‘kind of like what everyone else does’ she would add.
This back and forth between us went on for the first six years of our marriage. I could see how deeply it upset my wife when our friends canceled plans because of their children or would bring them up during conversations. Still, I felt like we just weren’t ready. In reality, I was holding onto a secret that I knew would make things fall apart. We were financially stable, had plenty of room in our home, and everything else that soon to be parents often thought about. Still, I kept finding excuses as to why it wasn’t our year to start a family.
So when she randomly came to me with a positive pregnancy test, I was at a loss for words. I was hurt because the only logical explanation was that she turned her back on our marriage. In the moment, I pretended to be excited, but after thinking it over, I presented her with papers. Of course, her face was one of shock, but when I finally told her the truth she slapped me before happily signing the papers.
‘By the way,’ my ex wife told me. ‘I’m not really pregnant. I just wanted to see how you would react. Now I know the truth.’
Honestly, I don’t think we were ever meant for each other. It didn’t take her that long to move on and finally start a family. I never thought I’d be the type of person to hold someone else back.”