Sometimes people hide their crushes for years. What happens when they finally admit to their best friend that they are madly in love?
A Man Keeps A Crush For Years and it Pays Off
“He told me that right from the start, the minute I pulled his name out of hat for a class project our first week of high school and called his name with a quick ‘who the heck is this guy,’ he fell in love with me. We stayed best friends all 4 years. He was my rock, my life. But he never told me how he felt. He just let me do my thing and he was always there if I need a shoulder to cry on or lean on. We kissed for the first time on our bus home from our senior class trip. I didn’t think anything of it. I guess I knew I just never acted on it because he never said anything. So we graduate and we go off to separate colleges. He never told me why he completely stopped talking to me. He disappeared and I never saw him again, no connection on social media, I didn’t even know his phone number. About 8 years pass and I hear that one of my friends from school that I had kept in touch with had seen him going to the gym near our house and that he had come back from college. I didn’t even think anything of it. Another year goes by and I sustain 2 severe head injuries. Brain bleed and all. One of our mutual friends tells him I had a few accidents and he sent me a message seeing how I was. Told him about it and that’s it. A few days later we run into each other and about an hour later I get a text with him asking me if he could come over and talk. I agreed and he came by and ended up spilling his guts! Told me how he’s been in love with me all these years, how he never said anything because he wasn’t ready. He even told me that he was sorry for judging me when I was in my drug smoking phase and that he ended up jumping in during university and that he hoped we could share one day. He basically wanted our friendship back and that he had missed me so much. About 4 weeks later he’s taking me to all of my examinations from my accident, helping me recover and slowly working on our friendship. It’s been 3 years since we’ve been officially together and we’ve been inseparable. I’m so in love with my best friend. We needed these years to really grow up and become functioning humans. His 14 year crush held up strong. I mean he didn’t pursue it right away but in the end when he was ready he did! Wedding bells are the next step and we are quite excited!”
The Years Apart Brought Them Closer Together in the End
“We met when we 13 and I was in love with almost from the start. We remained as friends for a good few years before we had a relationship which lasted close to 6 months when out of the blue she couldn’t do it anymore which broke my heart as I was still madly in love with her.
We tried to remain friends for a while but ultimately it was never the same and we drifted apart which I blame myself for the most part and she then remained my ‘what if’ for several years to come. Nobody was close to what I had with her.
Fast forward about 3 years and I’m now clear of a bad ending to my relationship after her when I was invited to a regular house party to which I have been frequenting to get myself back out there. The moment I walked in the door she was standing on the stairs with the host of the party and I have never felt so nervous in my life and we both mustered a ‘hi’ and scurried off. We met in the kitchen and began talking and it was like we’d never been apart. I had an amazing time just seeing her again but time can for me to leave with a mixture of feelings of overjoy and fear of my vulnerability.
Long story short she was scared too and got too drunk and added me on facebook which led to the present day. In 4 years together we own a cat, live together, still madly in love with her, still best friends and next year I’m going ask her to marry me at disney which we pre-discussed.
Consider myself a lucky guy.”
A Tragic Event Ends The Relationship for Good
“It took me two years to claw my way through the friend zone. Made it out the other side. Had an amazing relationship for like 3 years. Then her brother was killed in a car accident and the downward spiral afterwards ruined us.
She’s married with three kids now. I have my dream job and great friends and a new girlfriend.
I still think about how things could have been different. But you can’t play the ‘what if’ game. That will eat you alive. Nothing you can do about the past, but you can take those ‘what ifs’ into the next relationship.”
The Dream Comes Together and Lives On In There Two
“We met each other when we were both in relationships. Immediately clicked, very easily and quickly became best friends. He helped me through some of my relationship drama, I helped him with his break up and soon after my relationship ended, I realized how utterly perfect he was for me.
I waited a little while – didn’t want him to be a rebound or whatever – but soon after we ended up together.
It’s astonishing how easy everything was. We already knew each other so well, knew each other’s stance on important things and knew which way we both wanted our lives to go.
Living together came really soon and is going great. We understand each other’s needs so well, we get when the other wants some alone time or when we need some more intimate time together.
We can communicate so well, we always have, and we hardly ever fight. The only times we fight is over nothing, because we’re both tired or hungry, and even then we tackle that problem together and both realize we’re being stupid.
I have always dreamed of having a rabbit, now we have two. Seeing him with the fluffers absolutely MELTS my heart and I can’t wait to buy a house and a dog and have children for more of that cuteness overload.
Every day, I’m still as excited as the first day to go home and see him. I miss him even though we are never apart for more than half a day.
He still is my best friend.”
An Unsure Lesbian Still Has Questions After It Doesn’t Work Out With Her Crush
“Had a huge crush on her (me also a female) for a few months after we became best friends. Wasn’t sure how to admit my feelings or if I even should admit them. Eventually I could feel the tension between us and so I texted her one night after we hung out that I wanted to be more than friends. Turned out that she felt the same feelings. We experimented with each other and had a good time for a few months. Then she realized she actually wasn’t interested in girls. This broke my heart and I realized I was in love with her. It was torture hanging out with her after we broke up but she was and is an amazing best friend, so I made it work. I had many breakdowns, lots of crying, lots of mean words said, but this month I’ve started feeling better and think I have gotten over her. I still love her, though in a different way, and think we are soulmates. Sometimes I regret dating her, sometimes I don’t. We had some amazing memories and I finally discovered what love really feels like. It was amazing. But the aftermath really crushed me. I’m still trying to heal and get back to normal so I can date men again.”
Finally, She Takes A Bold Action
“She had an on/off relationship with another dude at Uni. I had a few relationships as well. She always knew I wanted to be more than friends, I think, whether or not I drunkenly told her, I don’t know.
She graduated and moved back to her home town about an hour away. I had another year of study to go, and was working as a part-time taxi driver. She was visiting friends who were still at uni, came out of a pub and found me in the taxi rank. She asked me to take her on a tour of the town. And at the end of the tour, she kissed me.
After that, there was a bit of awkwardness until a few months later. I was sharing a house with mutual friends, and she was staying over one weekend. I went to work on the Saturday night as usual, and she went out partying. I didn’t see her out on the town. Finished my shift at around 04:00 and went straight to bed. Funnily enough, I remember looking at her bedroom door and thinking about going to see her, but decided not to. Sometime after lunch she came into my room and asked if she could get into bed with me. I pointed out that I wasn’t wearing anything, and she shrugged and got in anyway.
That was 18 years ago, and now we have three children.”
A Couple Has A Real Roller Coaster Of A Relationship That Ends Tragically
“Back in middle school this girl, we will call her S, and I were best friends. We didn’t like each other or anything, just got along extremely well. So one day we’re at the park with two friends and S tells us she’s gonna hook up with this guy and is super nervous and we’re all excited for her. She’s never kissed anyone though. My friend goes, ‘hey, why don’t you teach her how?’ I figured why not and she agreed she’d rather have it be terrible with me than the guy she likes.
Man. I’ll never forget that first kiss. I mean it was electric. It only lasted a second, but afterward, we both just stood there and stared at each other. It was bliss. From that moment on it was me and her. For the next 5 years we were inseparable and known as the high school’s ‘married couple.’
Sure it was incredible. Making jokes, laying bed all day, exploring the world, unconditional love. I mean she made me feel invincible. There were a lot of bad times too though. She was diagnosed with depression, bipolar disorder, and separation anxiety. Her parents didn’t care and she 51/50 multiple times. One time when her parents were outta town and she was having an episode I got angry and stopped answering my phone. Later that night I found her OD’ing in her room on the floor.
As time went on the emotional abuse started to get to me and things got hard but I stuck through. We went to separate colleges but wanted to makes the distance work. We were only three hours away from each other. The day before I left she was terrified of me leaving her and proposes. I, of course, say yes and reassure her it will all work out. Literally the next day she dumped me and by the end of the week was dating another guy. 5 years down the drain. Just like that.
Do you know what that does to a person? And then I find out she was cheating on me for the past 2 months and some photos of her are going around town. I began to resent her so much.
We broke up about a year ago (I’m 19 now) and last month she texted me for the first time since she dumped me. She said ‘I always love you. You’re my youth.’ I didn’t reply because I promised myself I would never go back to her after what she did. Turns out she ended her life that night. I don’t know what to do with myself. I feel like I could have stopped it. I was so angry and selfish. I already haven’t been able to put myself back out there. Now it will be worse. I feel like damaged goods.”
Staying Friends After The Admission is Rare
“I fell madly in love with my best friend almost immediately. I met him in 2008 and was attracted to him right away. The more we hung out the more my feelings for him developed. I am also a guy and I knew that he was straight so it was very painful at times. We did everything together. Pretty much every single night for 4 years we were going out to bars or movies, just hanging out. We played music together and he introduced me to a lot of music I would have never listened to before. I loved him so much it made me sick at times.
The first 4 years of our friendship I was still closeted. He had no idea that I was gay. In 2012, at 24 years old, I decided to come out to every body. He and I went out that night and had a few drinks. After the night was over, he dropped me off at my apartment and I asked if he wanted to come in for a little bit and that I needed to talk to him about something. We were sitting on my porch, making small talk when finally I knew the time had arrived. I just came out with it and told him that I was gay. His first response was ‘You are?’ I said, ‘yes.’ Then he said ‘Really?’ Again, ‘yes.’ He then said that he had absolutely no problem with it and that stuff doesn’t bother him at all. He was glad I felt comfortable enough to come out to him. I didn’t tell him that I had feelings for him though. In fact, I told him that I had never looked at him in any other way other than a friend (LIE!!!). For some reason, at the time I felt like I had to say that as a defense.
Fast forward to a year later. I couldn’t take it anymore. I loved him so much and I just felt like I had to tell him. I felt like my feelings for him were starting to affect our friendship for some reason. So, one night he came over and I just told him that I had lied before and that I do have feelings for him. I said that it is something that I couldn’t control but I don’t want to lose him as a friend. His response was genuine. He obviously said that he doesn’t feel the same way but he understood how hard that it must be. I kind of distanced myself from him for a while because I felt a little awkward and I wanted to get over him.
He and I are still very close. We never talk about what happened because it just feels unnecessary at this point. I still love him but I am over him at the same time. At some point, when the time is right, I want to bring it up just so I can apologize for making him feel uncomfortable but even that seems a bit unnecessary.”
Years Of Missed Signs Spell Doom For A Friendship
“I had a crush on her early on but managed to move beyond it. From the first day of our friendship, she made it very clear in no uncertain terms that she was not romantically interested in me at all.
We were very close friends for many years. Took trips together, had season passes to a local theme park. If we were both single, we would be each other’s ‘date’ for any social gatherings.
She upped and moved 500 miles away and I even visited her several times. The last time we spent time together she had just gone through a terrible breakup and was not acting like her normal self. But honestly I had seen her like that before, so I gave her extra room and an ear to talk to.
You know, being a friend.
I apparently made two mistakes. The first, I had apparently made the comment that she seemed to have ‘loved’ they guy she just broke up with. In all honestly, I do not remember saying anything like that, not to mention in years previous I had made many very similar observations about her. The second mistake was giving her a quick hug about the shoulders on the way out the door, as I was going back home. This move was not without precedent. Both of us had initiated such a move on the other many many times over our relationship.
I got home to a very nasty email saying that she’s never been interested in me and that I presume too much and that she didn’t think the friendship would survive.
To say I was very hurt doesn’t even begin to describe it. It was worse than losing any of my partners. I did not react particularly well either. That’s on me. We have not spoken since.
The funny thing, over those years we were friends, I had numerous people, her friends as well as mine, tell me that they’re convinced she was in love with me. There was even a rumor running around that we got married once.
Did I love her? Oh, I think that is obvious, but my feelings for her were what I would feel for a sister. By the time our relationship ended, I hadn’t entertained the thought of dating her for well over a decade.”
No “Netflix n’ Chill” here
“Had a crush on my best friend for four years. Always believed she was never interested. It was pretty obvious I had feelings, but we never talked about it. After a few years I guess I finally got it. I was always looking at her and she just never looked back. It was never gonna happen.
And then one day, she did. After years of nothing, and finally moving on, it really messed me up.
We ended up getting really close, inseparable even. And then one day, she just stopped cold. I think that screwed me up even more. A few months went by, and we ended up getting really close again.
We started dating, though calling it that would be a little wrong. We didn’t make anything official, but it was a relationship. Things started out great, but like before, she soon turned completely cold. No affection, no hugs, no kisses. The night that sticks with me the most though, was one night when we were watching Netflix. She lays down with me in bed, looks at me with a disgusted face, and just says: ‘your not gonna try and love on me tonight are you?’
That was the moment I knew for sure it was over. We continued on for a while, but I just couldn’t take it. I had such strong feelings for her, and all I really wished for was to feel wanted by her. But she never made me feel that way at all.
We broke things off a while ago, but I’m still not over it. I don’t think I will ever be the same. Im lonely, but I don’t want to be with anybody. It also really killed my confidence in myself, and I don’t really know how to get that back. But above all, I guess I really felt such a strong connection towards her, and I’m not ready to feel that way again.”
From Hate To Feelings To Confusion To Friends
“I met her in 7th grade, and we hated each other. I was a huge nerd. I had a palm pilot (this was 2002 man, it was legit) and played games on it with the other nerds. Our last names started with the same letter, so me and her were always sitting close together. one time, we had to do a project together. I did all the work, and then she named it after herself and colored it all pink to spite me.
But by 8th grade we were okay. She became friends with my best friend, so we kind of were forced to hang out and get used to each other. our hateful banter eventually turned ironic, and by high school the three of us were inseparable.
The summer between my freshman and sophomore year of high school, my best friend spent most of that time out of the state with family, so it was just me and her. She got tired of me wearing baggy cargo pants and torn hoodies, so she took me to the mall and made me buy jeans, a belt, some button up shirts, just like normal nice teenager clothes. When I came out of the dressing room in the new wardrobe, the look in her eyes was just..
It was this moment that I knew I liked her as more than just a friend. Nothing came of it for a few years, but late into our junior year we started getting a bit flirty. A look here or there, our talks veering sexual. Until one weekend my parents left town. We decided that, because we were such good friends, we would lose our virginity to each other and not some random people in the future.
It messed things up. Things were weird for a few weeks, I was a bit clingier, she was a bit more distant. We had a big fight. We didn’t talk for almost 6 months. but, she was still best friends with my best friend. So we saw each other. and we became civil. Over the next year, we sort of had an unspoken mutual agreement to never discuss what we did. And it worked.
We are very close friends to this day, almost 10 years later. We tell each other everything and even though I live out of state, when we visit each other its like no time has passed.
There have only been a few times when the subject of what we did comes up. It is always sort of awkward, and we just pretend it didn’t happen. Sometimes it seemed like she wanted to talk about it.. But we never have.
She’s in a great relationship with a really cool dude, and I’m super happy for her. but I still feel exactly how I felt that day in the mall, shopping for clothes 12 years ago.
It been a wild ride.”
Can’t Be Friends, Can’t Be Lovers
“Best friend in high school (we are both guys). Told him after graduation, he’s not gay, as I had suspected, and was just too painful to be around him once I knew. Sucked because in one stroke I lost my best friend.
Our paths have crossed a few times since. It is sort of weird because most of the time we fall back to exactly how we were as friends and it isn’t at all like we went years apart and I am genuinely fine. But then he will give one stupid laugh, or use second facial expression, or some other nonsense like that and it just sort of all comes back up for me again.”
The End Of The Story Has Yet To Be Written
“Still going on and I’m a little stuck. We’ve been established best friends for 4 years and have been through so much. I had no feelings until about 8 months ago. Absolutely no explanation as to why it took so long.
I think my subconscious found out about my feelings before I did. 8 months ago, my university hosted a theme park visit that a bunch of friends and I attended. We were in a line, and I overhear her playing ‘F, Marry, Kill’ with another chick. The other chick presented my name and two other friends, and I overheard my best friend say she’d definitely marry me. I had a weird surge of pride hearing that. This is my first memory I have of any sort of feelings for her. It felt like a puppy doing endless flips in the pit of my stomach!
I really started to grasp what I was feeling weeks later when another dude was trying to hook up with her. We’d had such a crazy day, I really thought she’d cave into him. She’s usually not an easy girl but that day was a roller coaster. I felt an overwhelming need to protect her, but I decided I can’t control her and stepped back from the situation. That didn’t stop me from being endlessly worried! Luckily she didn’t reciprocate his advances, but the next day I knew that I’d fallen into a bad trap. I was in too deep with her. What was wrong with me?
I realize this story sucks because it doesn’t end. Maybe it will sooner or later. Maybe it’ll go on forever! I dunno. Our friendship is important to me, but is it fair to her that I’m having these thoughts? Her friendship is not something I’d like to lose, but these feelings haven’t been easy to lose either. Believe me, I’m trying. We’re starting grad school together soon, so there’s a lot ahead. I don’t know if I should just keep this all suppressed. I’m definitely not gonna spring it on her. But if she ever gave me an opening for something more, I know I’d take it for sure.”
Sometimes It Takes Years To Work Out Marriage Pacts
“My best friend and I met about 20 years ago when he was working at a TV station nearby. He is 10 years older so at the time I was 17, he was 27. He toured for years as a drummer so we stayed in touch, even made one of those ‘if I’m not married by 30, we’ll marry each other’ pacts. Hooked up once but nothing came of it, we weren’t in the right state of mind at the time I guess.
Flash forward 15 years, still hang out once a year, he got married and divorced, and I had gotten married in the same time as well but was miserable (ex was a dick). At the end of my marriage just as I was getting out of it, he drops the ‘you know I’d have treated you way better.’ We got together shortly after and it’s been 4 blissful years with no end in sight. We both admit we kinda knew we should have ended up together, glad we finally did.”
When The Timing Is Right, It’s Just Right
“We’re both females that have only dated males in the past, but one night we were talking and realized that we both had feelings for each other. Been together over four years and just celebrated our second wedding anniversary.
I became friends with a female coworker and became really close really fast. I hadn’t had a close friend in a long time but tried to play it off that I only had friendly feelings towards her. I had only dated men in the past, and she was dating a man when we met. One night we both hinted around our feelings and just blurted it out. We’ve been inseparable since that night over four years ago, and celebrated our second wedding anniversary in May. We both left the jobs where we met before we told anyone we were even together. It was weird to explain to my family and people I had known my whole life that suddenly I was with a woman, but I everyone sees how happy she makes me, and now they don’t even question it.”