Through the power of anonymity, guys share some surprising intimate details on what it means to be a man.
Just An Average Joe
We pretty much go through life unnoticed (save for negative attention). I have been going to a pet supply store for about a decade and although I’m always greeted nicely, I’m generally left alone. I walked in with a baby in a carrier one day, and I was greeted by everyone, and every single employee went out of their way to ask me what I was getting and if they could get it for me. I was fully capable for getting a 30lb bag of dog food and the baby but one employee simply wasn’t having it. He ran to the back to grab the food and carried it to the check out and then carried it to the car. I was shocked. I told my wife about it and she said, “They do that every time you go there don’t they?” Apparently this is the service she receives every single time she goes there, or pretty much anywhere with decent customer service. She was shocked to hear that I didn’t receive the same service. (Source)
Compliments Are Nice
Definitely that we also enjoy compliments. I just got out of a 4 year relationship and during some reminiscing thoughts, I realized she never once told me I looked nice or called me handomse or anything. I told her she was beautiful everyday for 4 years, and I don’t even know if she found me attractive.I have high self esteem, which is probably why I didn’t notice what was going on til after we broke up. I learned a long time ago that no one is going to love me the way I love me.
She was a good girl. I’m sure she didn’t realize she was doing it. (Source)
Guys Like Kids Too
I like kids. Kids are funny, they like breaking rules to have fun, and they still have an imagination. I DON’T F*CK KIDS. Hell, I hardly fuck adults either but that’s beside the point. A girl I went on a date with last week showed me a picture of this adorable little boy (her neighbor’s son) and told me sometimes she goes to the neighbor’s house just to see him. When I told her that I didn’t think that would ever be the case for me she seemed sad and asked why. Uhh… I’m a guy. “Hello, Susan, it would make my night if I could take your goofy 6 year-old daughter out for ice cream, I’ve had a very depressing day.” “You can fuck off before I call the police, how’s that?” “That works too, have a nice night, see you never.” (Source)
I’m a guy with kids and a wife who is a nurse that works nights. It is almost impossible for me to go do stuff with them without someone saying something about “daddy duty” or “mom got a free day today huh”. It’s ridiculous. Not every male with a child out there is some deadbeat parent who only hangs out with their kids when they absolutely have to. (Source)
What Are Compliments?
I remember my wife asked me years ago, “Hey, get any compliments on your bald head?” It was a drastic change, shaved head. She thought it fit my style. At the time, I only worked with guys. She looked amazed and shocked when I laughingly replied, “Are you serious? Doubt anyone noticed.” She thought I was heartbroken but in reality I would have been surprised if anyone did compliment. (Source)
“Be A Man”
The unwritten expectations on “being a man” are a big part of how our lives are shaped. For some it works out fine, for others it’s a disaster. (Source)
It is very rare to find a company or place of work that allows men to follow a seasonal dress code. It’s really hot in the summer? Women can wear dresses or skirts, men are still wearing suits. It would be nice to be able to wear a nice pair of shorts if it’s really hot out… (Source)
From my experience, women talk about sex with their friends much more, and in MUCH more graphic detail than men talk about the same subject with other guy friends. I guess my point is that men aren’t as sleazy and gratuitous as most women make us out to be. (Source)
Things Happen Because Of You
We are taught from a young age that things don’t happen to you, they happen because of you. You got a raise at work? Clearly you’re a hard worker. Have a wife? Obviously you wooed her correctly. Got divorced? You fucked up. She just fell out of love with you? You should have fought harder for her. You’re depressed? You need to suck it up. (Source)
Hard To Be Emotional
How awkward it is to cry or be emotional in front of other people even in situations where it would be normal, such as funerals. Usually bottle that stuff up and save it for when you’re alone and then let it out so no one sees. (Source)
Rejection. We have to deal with rejection on an entirely different level. Women will get depressed when they don’t get approached enough. We’re taught that we have to play a numbers game. We’re expected to approach woman after woman, get rejected to our face, not let it affect us on any personal level, and continue on to the next woman until we find someone who’s game.
We can’t let the rejections affect our ego at all, no cracks in our armor allowed. Because the number one thing a guy has to have is CONFIDENCE. Gotta have confidence bro. Don’t let women get you down, there’s another one out there. It’s to the point where I want to call it confidence-shaming.
So to a point you have to develop sociopathic tendencies and kill your sense of empathy so you can maintain your ego. That’s what it takes to not give a shit about the women who reject you. And that has consequences. (Source)
How body shaming happens to men as well. As a former high school linebacker and as a guy that gained weight due to surgery, I can tell you that the men that have decent bodies are on a different level than men that don’t. Men that don’t look “good” are reminded everyday of how inadequate they are. (Source)
We Have The Same Feelings
We feel everything the same as girls. That compliment, that insult, that breakup. We also like to be cuddled and have a girl play with our hair. I’ll probably delete this because of embarrassment soon which kind of proves that men aren’t allowed feel this way. When you think a guy has no interest in you he’s probably thinking the same thing about you. When you think a guy has to make the first move, he’s probably afraid to make the first move. Men don’t just want sex, while we like it very much, we also want love and affection. While men are labelled “studs” or “players” if you sleep with many girls, there is no real joy in it, only to raise our self-esteems. What we really want is a relationship who you can be yourself with. Hmmm… I’ve never posted something like this before. Something physical: when it’s cold or the penis is exposed it can shrivel up and look really small, please don’t judge a man’s penis size by his flacid willy. (Source)
Don’t Show Emotions
That most of us don’t have the type of friend system where you just go to someone and emotionally vent about your problems. Any problem you have must be solved in silence. Even today men who never ever complain are praised like they are super human. (Source)
Scared Of Kids
You have to be scared of kids. For example one time I was in the supermarket and a little kid came up to me and told me he was lost. But because people jump to call men pedophiles in the U.S., instead of walking the kid to the front or trying to help him find his mom and dad, I had to tell him to stand there and not to move, and I went to the front and got an employee. Now here’s the craziest thing. The first employee I found was male, and his response was “hang on, it’s store policy that male employees don’t handle these situations.” So he had to go get a female employee who then helped the kid out. I asked the guy after why that was the policy (even tho I kinda knew the answer) and he explained to me that it’s happened before just in this store alone, where a male employee had gone to comfort a crying kid or help them find their parents, and either the parents or a stranger has accused them of trying to kidnap them. So if you haven’t thought about this before, there you go. Now if you see guys walking past a kid who’s lost, you know why a lot of them are. It’s not a lack of wanting to help, it’s the intense fear of being falsely labeled something. (Source)
You know how worried you are about seeming like a slut? We are at least that worried about seeming like a creep. (Source)
I think most women would be surprised to learn that our piss doesn’t always come out in a nice steady straight stream. My wife still assumes I have no aim because of the times where it may be coming out more in a splash manner or the stream is just completely directed haywire. (Source)